The Crazy-Good Life of Mommy Going Crazy

2011-01-10T16:31:00.000-08:00

I've been posting on my other blog www.mommygoingcrazy.blogspot.com if you miss me, I am over there now. I would love to have you follow me over there!

2011-01-01T21:11:00.000-08:00

I just wanted to let all of my awesome followers know that I am going back to my roots. I started blogging forever ago on another blog called MommyGoingCrazy. I left there for some pretty stupid reasons, and now I have felt the urge to go back to it.

I have started posting again over there. I hope that everyone will please follow me.

www.mommygoingcrazy.blogspot.com

The blog is still being updated and is a bit of a work in progress so don't judge me.

2010-10-19T15:20:00.001-07:00

Life isn't easy. Life isn't awful either.

Actually life seems to be looking up. Finally right? Well we have had to endure some pretty difficult things to get to this point. Each day we take one step closer down the path to better things. I need this little reminder. (like really really bad....cuz I TOTALLY LOVE IT) Oh and it really is a good reminder that I can do hard things. (btw it is my cute friend Kim that makes these beauties)

I have done hard things and have lived through it.

I have done hard things and have become stronger because of it.

I will always have to do hard things.

Because I have faith that everything is for a reason...I am ok with doing hard things.

It's all going to be worth it someday. This I know for sure!

It takes 5 seconds to think of every possibility.

2010-10-07T21:28:00.000-07:00

Poke finger.

Insert blood into test strip.

I've done this a million times. Normally it isn't a big deal. Well, I hope it isn't a big deal anyway. The glucose meter starts to count down.

My stomach starts to hurt in worry. My mind races through a million possibilities.

What was the last time we tested? Have I waited too long? Anything could happen to my darling diabetics in even a few minutes.

My palms start to sweat. I knees get a little wobbly.

Things haven't been looking so good lately. The numbers keep getting lower and lower. What will it be this time? Should I have juice and glucagon handy just in case it's really bad again?

I need to sit down, I just might be the one to pass out from stress through these 5 seconds, the longest 5 seconds in history.

Last time she was low, the juice, soda, chocolate milk and crackers haven't brought her up very much. That's not a good sign.

I hug her tight. Who knows maybe this will be the last time I get to hug her before she starts to have a seizure. I pray "Please God, bless my child that nothing horrible will happen to her."

What else can I do? I have tried everything. I have been trained to take care of her. I don't have time for the why me's yet. There is only one more second until I have to react.

Another low. No surprise. 9 lows in one day, and this being the regular for her is not a good sign. I can't help but wonder "What about next time?" Will she be ok next time?

The count down continues. When will this scary cycle end?

The Bad "D" Day.

2010-08-30T13:46:00.000-07:00

Since I can't seem to escape the fact that diabetes stinks, I think I better post it so everyone knows what I have it today more than normal.

Today is the Princess' 2nd day of first grade. I don't want to be THAT kind of mom that is constantly hovering over her child, and I thought we went over everything enough last week with the teacher and the school that I thought I didn't have to go to school today except for lunch.

My stomach got all in knots around 9:15 when I thought she would be getting tested. They were told to call me if her #'s were out of range, but if there were ok, then there was no need to call. By 9:30 I didn't get a call so I thought everything was ok. Well about 10:30ish I got a call that she was 40!!! I know!! I asked what she had to bring her back up. A few teddy grahams. I told her she needed a juice too and to call me again in 15 min after they tested.

I was headed to the school at about 11 so I could get her all set for lunch. I hadn't received a call yet by the time I got there and was panicking a little. I walked into the school and she was still in the office. This was more than 30 min since she had been first tested by the way. She had been down there for so long. They had just tested her again and she was at 118.

One of the ladies at the office told me that the Princess had refused to test at 9:15, then again at 9:30. Finally by 10 she agreed to test herself. What the heck? I am irritated that she would refuse to test. If she would have tested earlier maybe she wouldn't have dropped so low and wouldn't have missed so much school. I have no idea why she would do this, but the teacher thinks that maybe she was embarrassed in front of the other kids. (I am going in tomorrow to teach the class alittle about diabetes.) We decided that she is going to do all her testing at the office, and I will talk with her when she gets home to see what happened.

So back to giving her insulin for lunch. We decided we would let her try school lunch. Last night I printed up the menu and all the carb counts and let her decide what she was going to have. She decided that she wanted a chef's salad, applesauce, a roll and chocolate milk. Not too bad. When I got to the school today the nurse and I gave her the insulin and the nurse left. I hung around to see how this was going to go. When she got in there the school didn't have the same side dishes that they had on the menu. There wasn't applesauce at all. (remember I had already given the insulin, and THE only reason why I was still there is because this is her first week of school. There is no one there to watch her while she eats, I wanted to make sure she can do this on her own.) Since there wasn't applesauce she had to choose something else. They had strawberries, bananas and "trail mix". Let me interrupt to let you know that this "trail mix" was a a mixture of fruit loops, rice crispies and chocolate chips! What kid would choose strawberries or bananas over this? Either way let me do this. The applesauce was 20 carbs. The strawberries were 16. The bananas were 10 and the trail mix was 45!!!! Whatever she was going to choose since there wasn't applesauce, there was going to be a difference in carbs no matter what.

She choose the trail mix.

Do you know what hell we go through to get her blood sugar down after she eats cereal? It's awful.

Anyway, I was not trying to "hover" too much. I want so badly for her to not feel left out that I let her get what she wanted. However, I went home thinking there is no one there to watch these kinds of things happen. Watch her make choices like this because what the school said they were going to have as side dish choice they actually didn't have. Watch her eat her food to see what she actually eats. Watches to make sure she gets more insulin because what was available to her has a much higher carb count than what she got insulin for. Who is supposed to be the watcher? I think for now it is me.

I get to go to school every day for lunch with my 3 year old in tow.

Atleast until I figure this out.

But honestly, why do they think that a handfull of cereal is a side dish?

I am irritated on so many levels.

If my daughter wasn't diabetic I would be able to send her on the bus to 1st grade like every other parent. Let her have her space at school. Let her have whatever side dish she wants. Let her eat the snack before recess. She wouldn't get in trouble on the 2nd day of school because she is refusing to test her blood. I could let her get back on the bus and come home to a mommy that wasn't so tired and stressed.

Stupid diabetes.

Just some random pictures for fun.

2010-08-30T08:10:00.000-07:00

Since I have been a bad blogger for many months now, why don't I post some pictures of things that I was going to blog about?

Little Man got a pump. We love it by the way!

Princess, Daddy and I got to go to a fancy dinner at La Caille for the JDRF.

Princess testing herself.

We got to meet Megann forever ago. I love her and her cute girls!

Typical scene that I find often with the Little Man. Always into something. This is chocolate syrup and powdered sugar.

The kids were being helpful while we were getting our house ready to sell.

Grandma and Grandpa came from Idaho for our walk. They had a BBQ and a swimming party the next day. We all had a blast!

Rock the Walk

2010-08-30T07:54:00.000-07:00

I wanted to document the JDRF walk this year. I didn't get a ton a pictures because I just handed my hubby the camera and told him to take what he could. Since I was running all over the place he kinda had his hands full with the kids. I am grateful that he was such a good sport with everything and he did a great job making the day fun for the kids.

The theme was Rock the Walk. It was at Wheeler Farm on Aug. 21st. I was on the Entertainment Committee with Wendy Cooper and LOVE LOVE LOVE it! We had been going to meetings since around May to plan it. We were in charge of getting the bands, the sound equipment, the bounce houses, the slides, the velcro wall, the bungee run, the super soaker course, the rock wall, and other little stuff. It was a big job, but honestly I would do it again in a heart beat!

The kids and I were able to go around to different businesses and talk about our lives with diabetes. This was to help get them excited about the walk and helping with fundraising as well. We started by going to Merit Medical way back in the Spring. They were one of the biggest sponsors of the walk. Because of this the kids were going to help with the ribbon cutting ceremony. We all got to be up there, but the kids were afraid of cutting their fingers on the HUGE scissors.

(Just to add so I can document this we went to Merit Medical, Taco Bell, Discover Card and American Express and talked to all of them about life with diabetes. I also got to be on a 30 min spot on the radio station X96. We feel lucky to have such great opportunities.)

There were over 6000 people at the walk. I feel it was a huge success. (Other than the grass being swamped the night before) Our team raised just over $1000!! I am so happy that we have such great support from family and friends that donated and came to the walk! It was a big deal for us even if it was our 2nd walk.

I can't wait for next year!

Preschool

2010-08-30T07:40:00.000-07:00

The little man started preschool!! I know, I can't believe it either. Those that have been following my blog for awhile (there are a few of you I think) might remember when he was born! Crazy, I KNOW! Time flys way too fast!

He was so excited to go to Amy's...err Mrs. Mitchell's class. He just LOVES her and her family! He started a few weeks ago before the other schools had started, so he even got to see Jessie (his 14 year old girlfriend)! I guess the first few days he would only let Jessie test him, not Amy. Silly kid would hide under the table if she would try. I always said he was a stinker.

He loves preschool and has already learned so much. Our favorite is his good manners and bad manners. We use that for everything. He thinks it is great to hold up his thumbs and tell us what he thinks about it.

He is a crazy kid, but I am so proud of him. He really can be sweet too, and I think that preschool will help balance this out. Amy has a big job, but I am sure he is better for her than for me. :)

Little Man, I love you. I love that you still fit in my arms just enough for me to snuggle at any point during the day. You have a very big mind full of lots of things, I hope that you will see how much fun learning is. You keep my life interesting and make me laugh every day. I love you lots kid! Be strong. Be good and be kind!

1st Grade

2010-08-30T07:15:00.000-07:00

The Princess started the 1st grade on Aug. 27. Why start on a Friday, and a short day at that, I will never know. She was so excited though! I was scared to death. Diabetes played nice, but I was there every few hours testing her and making sure everyone knew what was going on.

Her teacher seems really nice. Her name is Mrs. Tapia. She has never had a diabetic in her class, but she seems so willing to learn and to help out. I really like her, so does the Princess. There are also 5 other kids from our neighborhood in that class to so she already feels like she has friends.

Dude started school the day before her so he was excited to show her around a bit. He was really excited to see us at lunch. He came over and gave us a big hug.

I only got one phone call from her asking if she could have the snack that the class was having. She hadn't tested or anything and the school didn't really know what to do. We got it worked out, but I am praying that if parents are going to bring snacks it is something healthy. I really hate it when she feels left out!

Over all the first day went great! She was excited to go back. Hopefully today goes ok. I want to try to give the school a little space in figuring everything out. I will be there at lunch though! I still can't let that one go. Maybe after a few days of seeing how things go I can step back a little.

Princess you are a bright little girl. You have a smile that shines. I have no doubt that this year will be great, but please don't forget that when you start to feel alone in this big world, that your mom and dad are always right by your side. I love you little lady! Good luck this year!

2010-08-29T20:44:00.000-07:00

Nothing means more to me than this....each and every one of them.

2nd Grade

2010-08-29T20:09:00.000-07:00

My handsome Dude started 2nd grade on Aug. 26th. Man this summer went by fast! He was a little nervous to start school. He had so many friends in our old neighborhood and loved his old school he wasn't too happy about switching. It is so hard to see your kids go through feelings like that, but he is a good kid and a fun person to be around so I am sure he will make more friends in no time.

He lost his two from teeth in the last few weeks. He looks like I did when I was his age, but I was missing my 4 front teeth for several years. I just loved this picture of him.

He gets to ride the school bus every day, which is new to him. I actually think that this was the highlight of his day.

He is now going to the same school that I went to elementary school at. He teacher is Mrs. Diamond. Now she is an older teacher, but I don't think that she was there when I was. It is crazy taking my kids there now and remembering all the things I do from school. It actually makes me feel really old.

I really hope this year turns out good for him. With all the changes that have been happening lately he has been the one that has struggled the most. All I want is for him to be happy, healthy, and to be smart. He has the potential for all those things, I just get to teach him to take it one step at a time, and to find happiness in everything.

Good Luck Little Dude. You are growing up way too fast. Just remember as you walk out the door each day that no matter what your mommy loves you!

Mom always says not to run in the house!

2010-08-29T19:27:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday the kids were a little wound up from a fun day swimming and hanging out with Grandma, Grandpa and some of their aunts and cousins. I told them to settle down many times, but as usual they didn't listen. Dude was chasing Princess down the hall then she tripped and fell right into the corner of the wall. I heard it all the way from upstairs, but had to wait a minute to calm down before I went to check out the damage. When I got there Princess was holding her forehead and screaming. Once she took her hand off I could tell she was going to need stitches. Luckily the Instacare was open for another hour, so Grandma and I headed over there to have it taken care of. 3 stitches and a free ice cream cone later she was all better.

(She was super scared to get the stitches. We had to call daddy to help her calm down. She needed Dot, her bear, to hold too.)

(The Doctor didn't think it was too bad, but was happy we brought her in.)

(After it was numb, but before it was stitched. Poor girl wouldn't stop crying. The red punch mustache was from when we visited Aunt Steph's house. Steph always gives them a huge glass of Crystal Light when we visit, we just hadn't cleaned her up yet.)

(All better! She had to have them in for a week. I took her after church today to get them out. They put the stitches in a blue cup for her to take home. This was the highlight of her day.)

D Mom's to the rescue!

2010-08-26T11:59:00.000-07:00

Alright so tomorrow I have to send diabetes to school for the entire day. Who knew first grade could be so stressful?

We have an understanding of how the school likes to have things done, and what we want done too. But I have one major problem I just can't seem to figure out. I need advice from my trusty D mom's to help me get through it.

Here's my problem...

Lunch time.

I know, I know there are lots of ways that everyone does this. But hear me out first before I get swamped with emails.

First she is only 6. She has the basic understanding of how to count carbs, and for the most part she is pretty good at eating everything on her plate. Should I teach her how to handle this herself? Is she old enough to fully understand AND do it on her own? Or does she need to be supervised still? (I am thinking the later)

Second, we have the school nurse coming BEFORE lunch to give her insulin, BUT she can't stay to watch her get her food, or watch her eat it for that matter. WHO is responsible for making sure she eats what she was given insulin for and if not make any adjustments? Is this me? Do I need to go to school every day? Do I trust that it will be ok?

Third, Is it better for me to just send lunch every day? I found all the carb counts for school lunch. They have a pretty good selection, and Dude LOVES school lunch, but would it be easier to just send it every day?

HELP! I am meeting with the teacher and school nurse in a few hours and I am not sure how to handle it yet. SCHOOL STARTS TOMORROW!

Did I mention diabetes is going to give me grey hair?

2010-08-25T08:28:00.001-07:00

It's been awhile since I have posted and a lot has happened this summer. I am annoyed by myself that I haven't documented the last couple of months. We have been busy, but I also have admitted to have a tiny bit of a computer/blogging addiction in the past. My poor family only saw me with the screen in my face. I had take a break and focus on my family and get us through some changes in the past few months. I am going to try to ease myself back into blogging so I don't miss out on posting some important things...this is my journal after all.

To bring you up to date...

Our house sold! It was a long and stressful process but it sold! We are relieved to have that chapter of our lives closed. We are now living in my mom and dad's basement. We really feel comfortable here. My mom and dad really are amazing and are being patient with us while we adjust. We have quite a bit of space, the kids love having grandma and grandpa close by, we are starting to make new friends, and most of all mom and dad feel like we can breath again. I asked the kids the other day what was their favorite part about living here and all of them said that they can ride their bikes around the shed through the gate by the trailer and through the gate again. They can, and have done this for hours.

My hubby got accepted to the police academy! He starts on Sept. 7th. When he made this decision we knew from the start that this was what he was supposed to do. It has been amazing to see him go through the process and really see things happen. It truly does show that the path has been laid out for him, he just had to find it and follow it. When he first applied for the academy it was full. The lady there told him that he could get all his info in to her though and they will hold it if a spot opened up. So he got it all in within a week. She was so impressed by his desire to get in and willingness to get everything into her that she kicked out a guy that hadn't done anything yet and put my hubby in instead. He was #50 accepted to the academy out of 50! He has all his gear and is ready to go. Even though he will be gone every night, I will miss him, but I am so excited for him too!

Our Walk to Cure Diabetes this year was a hit! Our team reached our goal in a very short amount of time, and we had lots of friends and family come and join us. Wendy and I had meetings all summer long to plan the entertainment. We were in charge of getting the activities, rock bands, sound equipment, and face painters. It was tough job, but working with Wendy and all the other committee members made it so much fun! It turned out great! (I will be posting a whole other blog post to this so stay tuned)

Little Man started preschool a few weeks ago. He LOVES Mrs. Mitchell!! He loves to see Jessie (his 14 year old girlfriend), Mallory and Tyler. Amy is the best teacher and just makes everything so fun! I loved when he came home the other day and put his tiny little thumbs up and said "good manners" then put his little thumbs down and said "bad manners". Just the way he said it was so cute! It has helped us to teach him quickly more about his manners just by a thumbs up or a thumbs down. He has been trying to count too. For some reason he just can't remember the #7. He is still a stinker. He still gets into everything, but I love him to death and I am really proud of him. He is handling his diabetes as well as a 3 year old can. Each day gets better, but his #'s are getting worse as he comes out of the honeymoon. Time to make some changes.

Little Princess is going pretty good. She had to get stitches the other day. (I have pictures I will post when I get them on the computer) Her brother was chasing her and she tripped and fell into the wall. 3 stitches right on her forehead. She lost her first tooth a few weeks ago too! She was so scared to have it pulled out. Finally grandpa was able to get it out. She is excited to start school on Friday! I am scared to death to send her to 1st grade! I know that it will work out though, it always does, it's just the adjustment period when we get into a routine that scares me. She has met a few kids here in the neighborhood and 5 of them are in her class at school! This will be really good for her. One little girl, Lillie, was asking all sorts of questions about her diabetes. Her mom is being so great to teach her what she can and to learn more about it herself. This has meant to world to me and will be helpful at school.

Little Dude is having the hardest time adjusting to the move. He is still so sad about leaving his best friend Nathan. We have tried to get them together to play still but he misses him so badly. He has met a friend, Hyrum, and plays with him when he can, but it isn't the same. Starting school tomorrow will be good for him. To have the structure and to meet new friends. He has lost his two top front teeth in the last 2 weeks too. He looks silly, just like I did when I was his age. He is growing up so fast.

As for me, I have just been busy. Now that the walk is over I hope to find more time to work out, and get a little more organized. I am happy with where we are at in our lives so I am striving to seek guidance every day.

This is where we are. Now maybe I can post every day and keep up with this crazy blog again.

An eventful day

2010-08-24T12:55:00.000-07:00

I almost wish there was a way to know when you wake up each morning how the day is going to go. Sorta like the weather...if it is going to be pouring rain most of us would rather stay in bed. Well if I would have known my kids were going to get themselves into the situations that they got themselves into today, I would have just stayed in bed and skipped the day altogether.

You see we were asked to go to American Express today and speak with the JDRF. We have been doing this quite a bit lately so I didn't really think much of it. But today something was a little off because almost everything that could have gone wrong did. I was late so I couldn't drop Dude off at the sitter like I had planned, and both kids were high when we got there. Let me rephrase that for those non diabetic families, blood sugar high, not the other kind of high. Anyway, while I was speaking the kids couldn't sit still. Walking all over circling my feet you name it. I think the speech went ok, but they were distracting. I even got asked if they have ADHD.

When it was over a man asked the kids if they wanted to go out and see the fish in the pond behind the building. This was part of why they couldn't sit still. They could see the pond from where they were sitting and just couldn't leave the window alone, they were dying to go outside. Almost as soon as he asked if they wanted to see it the boys ran for the door opened it up and set the dang fire alarm off. I was so embarrassed. It was worse than the time the Little Dude set off the fire alarm at McDonald's. This building was 10 times bigger with way more people. The kids got to see the fish, but I had to restrain myself from nudging the oldest while standing a little too close to the edge of the pond. That would teach him a lesson. (Just kidding by the way...well sorta)

Our escorts took us to the front doors to say thanks and goodbye. I gave my badge back to the security officer and he kindly unlocked the door for us to all go through. He very clearly said "don't go through the revolving doors, I opened the other door" I told my kids just in case they didn't hear to NOT GO THROUGH THE REVOLVING DOOR GO THROUGH THE OTHER ONE. They apparently had their own agenda and all three of them headed straight to the automatic revolving door. Dude made it through then sister came after. She made it through too. Little Man was about 2 steps behind her. He stuck his head in to get through in the same section as his sister and wouldn't you know the door slammed on his head. He was S.T.U.C.K! It was trying to still "revolve" and was totally crushing his head. I dropped everything and tried to get the door open a little. There was so much force it wasn't moving. Little Man at this time was crying and screaming a scream like I have never heard. I was trying so hard to get it open but I couldn't. Another man came over and tried to open it. He couldn't open it either. With both of us forcing it open we finally got it open just enough to get his head out. The stupid door just kept revolving while I held him in my arms. I was shaking he was screaming. It was awful. There was so much force that in just the few seconds that he was stuck it gave him a big goose egg on the side of his head. You could see where the skin was about to crack and bleed. I am so grateful we got him out, but it makes my stomach sick to envision it again. It really was horrifying to see him stuck like that with the door crushing his little head. We had to go to the on site nurse to make sure he didn't have a concussion. Thankfully he is ok. Me not so much.

It has been an awful day. All three kids have been at each other's throats all day. As I type I have Dude and Princess writing the sentence "Showing respect shows love." over and over again. Mean mom? Maybe, but after today I am a little grumpy. I am planning on drowning my grumpiness in all the peanut butter and chocolate as I can later tonight.

Also, I am pretty sure that American Express won't want us to come back any time soon.

2010-08-17T21:07:00.000-07:00

Bad blogger...I know!

I'm about to make it up to you!

I'm still here!

2010-06-24T13:48:00.000-07:00

In case you were wondering, yes I am still here.

I haven't done much blogging at all, I don't feel like I have time for it right now. Our lives are super busy and spare time is spent with a much needed nap or a good movie most of the time.

What are we up to you are asking? Well first of all we are still in the process of moving. The closing date is in a month. It has been the most stressful thing that I have ever gone through. I can't wait for it to be over with. My faith has grown, but has also been tested. I am so grateful for the temple. After an awesome time there the other day I am now convinced that miracles do happen. It will all be over with soon, and a new chapter can now be opened. I can't wait!

I got the kids registered for their new school the other day. They will no longer be in year around school which means that they will actually have a summer vacation! I am mostly excited because I found out that the school nurses will all be the same for that school as well! In fact they have it set up already for another little boy to have the school nurse come every day at lunch to bolus him for his food! This was good news! Sending Brooklyn to first grade was about to kill me. The stress has been lifted by quite a bit. I am so happy we decided to have them switch schools!

So crazy things had been going on with my health. I still don't feel like I have many answers, but after a few test we found out that my liver isn't working like it should. I have to avoid alcohol (hahahaha) and Tylenol for awhile and see if that helps. Then I think they will do another test to see if it changed anything. Who knows what is going on, but to be honest I am not worried about it. I have far too many other things to worry about right now.

My hubby is doing great. He has decided to do a 180 and leave/stop trying to get a job in the financial world. He was all lined up for a pretty good job with New York Life Insurance, but felt it wasn't the right way to go. It was still a commission based job and he realized that he will never be happy there. He is going to start back up with school in the Fall and will graduate in a few semesters with a degree in Criminal Justice. Yes, this means he has decided to be a police officer and will be going through the Police Academy as well. This is what he has always secretly wanted to do, and I am so proud and happy that he is taking the opportunity to follow his heart and do something that he wants to do. This might come as a shock to some of you, but to me this was no surprise. I feel that this is what he needs to do and I couldn't be more excited and proud.

I am also on the planning committee for our JDRF walk this year. Wendy Cooper and I are the Entertainment Co-Chairman. This means that the two of us are in charge of planning all the entertainment for our walk that about 6000 people attend. This is a big job but I am loving it! Working with Wendy is great! This girl has quickly become one of my best friends. We think and act so much alike that it is making this job more easy that I thought. I know I know ask me in a few weeks when I am a little more stressed about it.

So that is about it for now. Our lives seem to be getting crazier and crazier by the day.

2010-05-07T15:33:00.000-07:00

There are well over 1000 posts on my google reader that I have been ignoring, and I have a confession.... it hasn't bothered me one bit.

Don't get me wrong, I miss what everyone is up to, but I don't miss spending way too much time on the computer ignoring my family and responsibilities. It was getting out of hand, causing problems if you will, but I can't not post on my blog forever. It is my journal after all. And I really do miss hearing from my "imaginary friends".

Lots and lots has been going on. Almost too much to blog about. But to summarize our house has been on the market for about 3 weeks. We have 2 offers already, but we are waiting for the bank to make a decision. This could take a bit, but I am not worried about it. Things are going the way they should and I know that it will work out.

My hubby did his 2nd triathlon the other day! He did awesome! He is planning on doing another one this month too. I think that he really enjoys the challenge. I enjoy seeing him succeed at something that he has worked so hard at. I am so incredibly proud of him.

All the kids have had their birthday's. They were all spoiled, and loved every minute of it.

Brooklyn was student of the month for May. It was so much fun to go to the school and watch her get her prize and hear why the teacher choose her. Kindness is a quality that comes easy to her, it's no wonder why she was chosen.

Mother's day was amazing yesterday! It was the first one in a long time that I didn't beat myself up over the things that I need to do different as a mother and end up in tears. It was a wonderful day! Other than Tyson being sick. I am one lucky person to have amazing kids and the best husband ever, and let's not forget the best mother! My mother in laws are pretty awesome too.

Hayden is wanting so badly to train for a triathlon. They have ones where kids can compete and are shorter than the adult races. I hope we can find a way for him to do this. He would love it and do so well. He and some of his friends have started running teams at school where they spend their recess racing all the other kids in the grade. This is his favorite thing to talk about, and from what I hear, he's pretty dang good.

As for me, I am just happy. I am happy with everything that is going on in my life. I am happy for the choices that we have made. I couldn't be more excited for the future. Cheesy I know, but it has been too long since I have felt this peace.

So don't be worried if it is awhile since you hear from me again. I am busy trying to be the best mom and wife I can be. Life is wonderful!

The New Adventures of Pippi Longstocking

2010-05-06T11:20:00.000-07:00

This is a long video clip but if you start watching it somewhere around the 2:30 mark you will get to why I am posting it.

Brooklyn watched this movie the other day for the first time. To say that she loved it was an understatement. Her favorite part was (as you will see in the clip) when she buys ice cream and candy for all the orphan kids. Little did I know how this movie would impact her life. Even if it wasn't intentional. Let me explain.

We just celebrated Brook's 6th birthday. She has the best grand parents and great grand parents that sent her cards with a little birthday money inside. She was so excited about the money since there are several things that she wants to save her money for, like a Nintendo DS. She only has one weakness though...the ice cream man. As a diabetic this is really difficult for her to pass up but I almost always tell her no she can't buy anything from the ice cream man.

Well the other day she had been outside playing. She must have heard the music from the truck when it was several streets over. I am quite sure she thought that she had her own money so there was no need to ask for permission. Next thing I know I hear the ice cream truck right outside and she was walking through the front door holding a big ice cream that she had just bought. I asked her where she got the money for it, she replied it was her birthday money. I was trying not to be mad, trying to understand that it is her money and it wouldn't hurt anything if she wanted to do this just once. So I asked her where the rest of her birthday money was. " I gave it to the [other kids in the circle] so they could buy some" she replied. I started adding up how much money she got for her birthday and just realized she had handed out $40 to a handful of kids in the circle to buy ice cream! I went running outside just as the ice cream truck was pulling away, I am sure smirking at me knowing what had just happened. I saw all the kids running into their homes with HANDFULS of ice cream and cotton candy. I flipped! I told Brook what she had done and from the look on her eyes she was pretty mortified! (May I just add that she doesn't understand yet the difference between a one dollar bill and anything else. To her it is all the same.) So I asked/yelled at the kids to give me back all the change that they had from her birthday money. I asked one kid how much she gave him " She gave me a $20 bill." he says. " I need the change, she shouldn't have given that to you! Most importantly since you are in the 3rd grade I would have figured you would have known better than to take a $20 bill from a kindergartner to buy ice cream!" He emptied his pocket and gave me the change. $1.50!!!! I was so mad!! The other kids all handed me the change they had too. Total the neighborhood kids spent over $17 of Brooklyn's birthday money to buy ice cream.

All I could think of, after I cooled down of course, was Pippi Longstocking. My silly Brooklyn was just trying to be nice.

And may I make a public apology to all the parents and kids on my circle. Yes, I was pretty mad that she handed out her money, but I was even more mad that kids that are way older than her accepted $30 without question. Buying ice cream from the creepy ice cream man is now off limits! And for the record, I didn't make any of them pay her back. Lesson learned I guess!

And really we are all laughing about it now!

The last few weeks

2010-03-29T17:51:00.001-07:00

There has been so much going on at our house lately. It has caused a bunch of questions so I thought I would just take time to write on my blog.

First of all, I wrote that we are selling our house. This has been such a huge relief for us. I have posted this in the past so to summarize, 2 years ago my hubby lost his job. The income that he was making at that time has never been replaced. It is a tough market for his line of work (banking/financial) and it seems that financially everything has been a struggle ever since. Not to mention that 5 months after he got laid off the Princess was diagnosed with diabetes then almost exactly a year after that Little Man was diagnosed. To say that it has been a rough few years is a HUGE understatement. We have done everything we felt was right. We have prayed, we have fasted, we have tried everything, but there was still no light at the end of the tunnel. That was until we realized that the only way to get out of this mess is to start over. This means selling the house and moving in with my mom and dad to be able to get back on our feet again. As pathetic as it sounds to be in your 30's and moving your family in with mom and dad, I am actually really excited. This is the first time in a long time that I feel like there is an end in sight and that we are taking the right steps in moving forward. My mom and dad are saints to be willing to do this for us! They are amazing people and my goal is to be like them some day. Guess that just means that I need to live with them for awhile to see the example up close and personal. :)

Our house will be on the market soon. It is a tough housing market here in Utah, so we will see what happens. I really hope that after knowing without a doubt this is what we need to do that it won't take long, but I am prepared for the worst. We have been cleaning and organizing for a few weeks and that in itself is refreshing!

In other big news I quit my job. This was a tough decision for us. It is a little complicated why I quit, but again, I know it was what I needed to do. So to be honest, and hopefully brief, I quit because my kids need health insurance. We have been battling insurance issues for several months now. We had a hard time getting approved for medicaid because of our income, but because my husband is self employed they approved the younger two. After children turn 6 they are put into a different tax bracket and you have to make less money in order for them to have medicaid. We were border line before so they don't qualify after they are six. Little Dude hasn't had it in over a year, and after the end of next month Little Princess won't have it either. There is the option of C.H.I.P insurance but only if you don't have any other insurance. Right before the Princess was diagnosed I signed up for the part time insurance with jetBlue because I felt that I needed something. Turns out that is the very thing that is holding us back from getting insurance for my older kids. I contacted the benefits department at work and they wouldn't let me cancel the insurance until open enrollment, then be in effect in January. I tried to fight my case, but there was nothing they could do. So the way we looked at it, we can't take the chance of the kids not having insurance from April until January, and the only way to get rid of it at this point was to quit. So I did. It stinks, but I am also relieved.

So you see we have been busy here at our house making life changing decisions. It hasn't been easy to make so many big decisions all at once. Thankfully we are being guided and our prayers are being answered. I haven't been this happy for several months.

In between all this decision making Little Man has struggled with croup, strep, and a dislocated elbow. Poor kid has been to the doctor 5 times in 3 weeks. But he did have a birthday yesterday and I think that he has officially forgotten all about all that other stuff.

So there you have it. Life is busy as always. Hopefully I will have time to blog more in the upcoming weeks. I have so many things to get caught up on. I could write twice a day for a month and still have things to write about. Thank goodness you are all so patient with me.

2010-03-23T08:19:00.000-07:00

" No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we do it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender, charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God...and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire."

~ Orson F. Whitney

The change of the seasons

2010-03-17T16:28:00.000-07:00

Change is in the air and boy am I just thrilled.

It has been a long long winter. The sunshine and warmer weather has never been more welcome. I cleaned my house today with all the windows open. It is lame to say it was amazing? Maybe it was the cleaning part that was amazing....now that IS lame to say! But you know those days where you're in "the zone" and you get lots of things done and it is so refreshing? Today was one of those days!

Spring is knocking on my door, but that isn't the only change that is happening around here. The biggest one of all.....we are selling our house.

If I would have uttered those words a year ago it would have been through tears. But today I am ready. It is needed, and honestly this is the first time in 2 years that I feel like I can take a deep breath. The fight is almost done. The terms are good, and I am excited to see what the future holds. Don't get me wrong it is still hard. When we told the kids they cried and complained. They really, really don't want to leave their friends. Heck, I don't want them to leave their friends. I don't want to leave my friends here either! This choice was not an easy one and we didn't take anything lightly. But the choice was made prayerfully and with an open mind about the future. We know that this is the best option for us right now. Regardless what people say or think, we tried our hardest.

Who knows how long it will take the house to sell. It could be months. In the mean time I am working my hinny off trying to junk almost everything. Really....I took over 10 bags of garbage bags full to the DI yesterday. (Remind me to tell the story of the bank getting robbed while we where there....that was a fun experience!) Garbage day isn't for another 2 days and my garbage cans are already full. It feels great to be getting rid of excess baggage that we have been holding onto. Physically and emotionally.

Today my heart is full of gratitude for the love and support that we received along this crazy journey over the last few years. This time in our lives could be so much worse if it weren't for our amazing family and friends. I don't know how to thank everyone. My mom and dad have always told me that sometimes the only "thank you" you can give is to pay it forward and help someone in the same situation some day. This is my goal.

Croup

2010-03-08T13:19:00.000-08:00

From the wheezing and coughing in my ear, and the "I really need a drink of water" every 10 minutes throughout the night, I kind of figured that the Little Man had the croup.

I took him to the doctor this morning and sure enough, I was right.

Because he was having such a hard time breathing they gave him a dose of dexamethasone. Wikipedia definition: Dexamethasone is a potent synthetic member of the glucocorticoid class of steroid hormones. It acts as an anti-inflammatory and immunosuppressant.

Anyone else see something familiar in that definition? You see that word glucocorticoid? The name glucocorticoid is made from 3 words (glucose + cortex + steroid). Yes GLUCOSE.

I don't need Wikipedia to tell me what the steroid is going to do to his blood sugar. Actually back in October Little Princess has the same dose and it was complete havoc on her blood sugar where it wasn't below 400 for 2 days. I fully expected them giving this to him when I took him in, but when the Pediatrician called his Endocrinologist and came back and said "The Endocrinologist wants to see him in the office on Thursday. He feels that this steroid alone could kick him right out of his honeymoon." it kind of surprised me a little. You see we caught his diagnosis so soon that we thought his honeymoon would be a really really long time. Right now the only insulin that he gets is at meal time or when he is high. Which isn't all that often. The doctor wants to see him in a few days because he feels he will have to start getting some sort of basal insulin.

Guess what this means? That he can start using a pump a little sooner than we thought. The approval has already been done for it, I just have to fill out some more paperwork. I never thought I would feel this way, but I can't wait to use the pump for him too!

So we will see after Thursday for sure, but maybe in a few weeks I might have 2 pumping kids. One with a pink one and the other with a green one. How exciting! I will keep you posted.

2010-03-01T22:30:00.001-08:00

I am feeling super emotional today.

I am wondering again what the future brings.

I am grateful for friends showing up at my house when they knew I needed them more than I did. Turns out they were right.

I am hugging my kids more tomorrow than I did today. They need to know their mommy loves them.

I am going to try to get some sleep and eat more healthy because my body deserves it.

I am blessed that I have my hubby close by to hold me tight and assure me it is going to be ok.

I am going to look back on this time in my life and know without a doubt that it is my faith that gets me through the day.

I am thinking I need to start looking at the good in all things instead feeling like everything is a struggle.

I am meant for something great.

I am determined to find out what that is.

I will find it.

The Little Man

2010-02-28T13:32:00.000-08:00

No I didn't have another girl that no one knew about. This is just what happens to the Little Man when his sister gets her way.

This week has been on crazy for the Little Man. You see he is always a little mischievous but this week he seems to be a little more so. It all started on Wednesday when I came upstairs for a break from work, I saw him walking around the corner with his pants half way pulled up. I asked him if he went potty and he proudly said "YES!" I asked him if he had flushed the toilet. "No, I didn't go in the toilet" he said. I asked him where he went then? "[Princess'] backpack" he replied. I turned the corner then there in the middle of the hallway was the backpacked, soaked. So was the floor all around it. My guess is he was pretending it was on fire and he was the fireman.

The next day my hubby walked into the kitchen and the Little Man was crouched behind the counter with chocolate frosting covering his face. He had gotten into the fridge and took out the container of left over frosting from Little Dude's birthday cake. We have no idea how much frosting was in there, but he had polished off the entire container. 20 carbs for 2 tablespoons, a wild guess of how much insulin to give and a few hours later things were under control. This is time that I am thankful he is in his honeymoon still!

Then Friday morning he woke up really early. One of the other kids woke up not too long after he did (I didn't even know he was awake to be honest) then came running into my room to tell me that he was painting his hand with fingernail polish. I walked into the family room and there he was a glove made out of fingernail polish. His hand was completely covered. It took me almost 30 minutes to get it off.

Then on Saturday he took off his clothes to run through the house completely naked a grand total of 5 times! If he wasn't running around naked he was sneaking out the front door to run two houses down to see if Max, the 15 year old neighbor, would come over and play with him.

Then today I came home from church to a very frustrated daddy because Little Man, for some unknown reason, decided to pee in the HUGE container of lego's. Daddy was washing every single one of them in the bath tub. It took him almost 2 hours to make sure all of them where clean.

He is quite the character I tell ya! Here is another short list of things this kid has done this week.

-Went to a high school basketball game and told a girl that he was 16 years old and that indeed he would love to go to prom with her.

-Refused to give his "girlfriend" Jessie back her blanket after she came over to help her mom do my hair for the wedding. He came up with a plan that she could have his as long as she left her blanket. He carried that thing around for 2 days until I made him give it back to her.

-While this post is all about Little Man I better tell you about Jessie. She is my friend's 14 year old daughter. Over the summer we went to lunch together and Little Man fell in love with Jessie. He constantly asks me "where's Jessie?" "can Jessie come over?" he even goes to find her at church every Sunday. He will follow her around, holding her hand and hugging her. He loves to play with her! He told all Jessie's friends that "Jessie is my boy friend" at the basketball game last night. She came to see him in the hospital when he was diagnosed and gave him a teddy bear. His Jessie bear has to sit at the end of his bed every night! He made a Valentines for her and will wrap up his cars to he can give them to her. While this has nothing to do with Little Man, Jessie was tested a few weeks ago for Celiac Disease. Her blood levels came back pretty elevated so she had a scope done last week. They are waiting for the results. Oh and it is her birthday today....sort of. She was a leap year baby born on Feb. 29th. Next year Little Man will technically be older than her! LOL!

-Convinced someone at the wedding to give him a piece of wedding cake. He had eaten almost the entire thing before I knew about it.

-Watched my wedding video over and over and over again because he wanted to watch mommy in her pretty dress. He asked me ALL day long "You getting married mommy?"

See it really has been a busy week with him. I do think he is adorable, but he keeps me on my toes! Like I have always said "whoever coined the phrase 'terrible two's' never had a three year old!

******Update*******
Just thought I would add that he was caught writing on the hard wood floors today with blue permanent marker. Honestly, this isn't even funny anymore....maybe tomorrow I will laugh.

Proof that my "Imaginary Friends" are not actually imaginary!

2010-02-27T08:48:00.001-08:00

I can't tell you how happy I was to be able to go to lunch with Wendy and Shamae yesterday. With my sister in law's wedding yesterday too I didn't think that I was going to have time to go. At the last minute a few plans changed and I made time to meet up these gals (and Loren) for lunch at Chili's.

Shamae was here in town meeting with Dr. Swinyard (aka THE BEST ENDO EVER!) so it was the perfect chance to meet up with her again, and well Wendy what is our excuse that we hadn't met sooner? Oh well there are no excuses now!

While we were waiting for a table all the kids, minus Morgan (thankfully!) got out their testers and tested their blood sugar. Little Man was so excited. I really think this is the first time that he saw someone else other than his sister test. He thought is was great! The girls were right in range and the boys were a little high in case you wanted to know! :)

When you blog stalk someone or chat on facebook for a little bit but never meet you wonder what they are going to be like in real life. I am so happy to say that they both are as amazing, funny, and easy to get a long with as they are in the cyber world. It really was like long time friends getting together again.

While eating Little Man stole the hearts of all the adults. He was playing footsies with Wendy and just talking to everyone. When it came time for him to get his shot he wanted Wendy to hold his hand. I admit he is a cutie!

I loved Avery, he is so stinking adorable! And so tall! I felt bad when all the girls moved away from him so they could sit together. Poor Avery! He is such a sweetie! He sure did love dipping his corn on the cob in his ketchup! I love adventurous kids!

The girls sure did have a great time Little Princess and Sydney are pretty close to the same age. She had a ball with the girls and has asked when she gets to play with them again. I so hope they can play more often!

I only have 3 regrets. First that I have is not being able to stay longer and chat. Second not having the rest of my family there. Trevor and Loren would have gotten along great, I just know it!

And third, not having the rest of my D mom friends there. I can not wait to meet the rest of you!

Happy Anniversary!

2010-02-25T16:00:00.000-08:00

Dear Trevor,

10 years ago I was madly in love with you and eager to start our lives together.

10 years ago you took my hand in Eternal Marriage and we promised to stick together through the good and the bad.

10 years ago we had dreams of a happy, successful, and beautiful future together.

10 years ago we could sit and laugh at some really dumb things together.

10 years ago we would lay in bed every night and watch movies (Ok Cheech and Chong's Up in Smoke mostly) before we went to bed.

10 years ago you inspired me to always be my best.

10 years ago your quick whit would always make me smile.

10 years ago my heart would melt when we would see each other.

10 years ago you made me feel like a princess.

TODAY
None of that has changed.

Except that we have 3 amazing kids that share in all this with us!

And that I love you more today than I did 10 years ago!

Happy 10 year anniversary Trev! I couldn't be more happy to be your wife!
__________________________

Last year I posted this video on our anniversary. I would love to share it again, but I am too lazy to copy and past it here. Please go check it out and read all about our wedding day!

What I REALLY wanted to say but couldn't because I would get fired.

2010-02-25T08:27:00.001-08:00

"Yes, just as you said, I have F*#^ lost my mind! This is why they have padded all the walls in my office and are only letting me use sporks for now on."

"Let me just go ahead and pull this airplane out of my back pocket, put it in your route, and write your name on a seat. Will that fix your problem?"

"Didn't you know that it was my job to make you miserable?"

"No! I don't think you know how I feel!"

"Since when was everything free?"

"Sure lets hold together for another 45 minutes for my supervisor to tell you exactly what I just told you!"

"Miracles happen all the time, just not in New York's airspace!"

"I would be happy to pick up the phone and call Mother Nature and ask her when it is going to stop snowing. Do you have the number?"

"Is is really a good idea to try to check your boat engine as luggage? Is it REALLY that important?"

"I have said it a hundred times, they will not let you just go to the ticket counter with an expired passport and let you "talk your way" onto an international flight!"

"I can't give you something that isn't there. Sorry!"

"We don't have rules and regulations just so I will have something to do and you will have something to complain about. They are actually there for a reason."

"If you don't know how Daylight Savings works by now then maybe you should question where you have been for the last 70 years."

"I would be happy to tell you what time to set your alarm clock for, but it probably wouldn't help you get to the airport on time."

"I think you have more problems than not being able to assign a seat."

Can you tell that this last month of working has been SO MUCH FUN? I can not wait for February to be over with! Please let's pray that I don't have to keep working mandatory overtime into March too!

Congressman Chaffetz

2010-02-23T10:05:00.000-08:00

When asked what our life is like with having to deal with diabetes my first thought is always crazy! Then I start to think about it all and most of the time I cry. I try to not let my emotions get the best of me, but lets be real, it was only a little more than 3 months ago that Little Man was diagnosed. Three months of dealing with two diabetics. One was hard enough. I don't feel like we had time in between the two diagnosis to find our new normal so it has been a big adjustment. Each day I still feel like my life is consumed with counting carbs, testing blood, keeping the Little Man out of food, figuring out why the Princess is high....you get the idea. Throw in the fact that our insurance was cancelled for February without notice, and the school board possibly cutting the school nurse program and my poor brain almost can't focus on anything else but diabetes.

Last week when the JDRF asked us to go meet with Congressman Chaffetz I couldn't pass up the opportunity, but I was scared. I laid awake all night thinking about what I was going to share. I didn't want to sound pathetic. My hubby kept telling me to just be me and share whatever comes up. I wasn't sure that "flying by the seat of my pants" was a route to go, but I trust him and his judgement. Plus I didn't have any other choice, my brain was too tired from working so much I couldn't put more than two thoughts together.

The entire family drove to Provo the next morning. The kids didn't totally understand what we were doing. We explained that a Congressman works with the President of the United States to help make laws and stuff. He was going to go to Washington DC to talk about a bill that helps fund money to research for diabetes. (the Promise to Remember Me campaign)They seemed to get that. The Princess wanted to take her own camera to document her time there. (It was a super proud mommy moment! She was thinking like me!) We were meeting up the another mother and her son who is also diabetic and the representative from the JDRF that invited us there.

I didn't know what to expect. My tummy was in knots. I was pleasantly surprised though when he invited us into his office to sit on his couch while he sat on the desk to just chat for a minute. He asked the kids a few questions about diabetes. "Is it hard?" "Do you feel different than other kids?" "How many shots do you have to have every day?" Each of the kids answered all his questions with ease. He asked us parents "how did you know they were diabetic?" The other mother stated symptoms that she saw in her son before he was diagnosed. She knew the signs. Her husband is diabetic. Congressman Chaffitz turns to us and asked the same question. Before I could answer Little Dude piped up and said "She kept peeing the bed all the time!" Oh I was worried for Princess, I was so sure that she would be so embarrassed. She didn't seem to be too effected by it thankfully and the conversation just carried on.

We talked for a few minutes. Talked about our struggles with insurance, with the school board (all of which he was very interested in) We talked about how as a mother we worry each and every day if our children are going to make it to the next without any major complications. my statement to him (that I truly hope he remembers) "I wish every day that we could just ignore diabetes. I wish that I didn't have to do all these extra things to keep our kids alive. I wish that we didn't have to get up 1 or 2 times in the middle of the night to make sure my kids are still breathing. But I can't. Diabetes can't be ignored! The hope for a cure can't be ignored either. Every improvement they make not only gets us closer to a cure, but they continually help us find ways to improve their diabetes management."

That was it. 10 minutes sitting on his black leather couch. A few minutes of pictures, and hopefully a memory to last a lifetime.

I came home feeling empowered. I could totally do that again! In fact I WANT to do that again! My voice can be heard....hopefully....if not through that way, maybe another! I can't thank the JDRF enough for that opportunity!

Me

2010-02-16T09:28:00.000-08:00

Shamae I read your entire post and loved it! I too have a few more followers so maybe another post about me is due.

So here it goes...

~I hate drinking milk out of a plastic cup. For some reason it just tastes different to me. The cup must be a glass cup!

~My absolute favorite date is to go to dinner and a movie. I have always loved watching movies, but going to the movie theater is seriously the greatest thing. My dream is to be able to make enough money that we can go to the movies every week as a family.

~I feel that I have the potential to be a really amazing person. Unfortunately I am stuck at being mediocre. There is so much that feel I should do or I felt prompted to serve but there is something holding me back. I haven't narrowed it down quite yet, I am sure there are many reasons actually, but someday I want to move past it all and be the woman that I am meant to be.

~I own over 100 cookie cutters. I used to make sugar cookies at least once a month, but it has been a long time since I have made them.

~When I was in Junior High I was so self conscious that I used to change into my gym clothes in the shower stalls. Thankfully the only people that have ever made fun of me for it is my sister. (Love you sis!)

~A few years ago our family wanted to become more self reliant. We have a pretty large yard so we ventured out in getting chickens. Jane and Mini were part of our family for about a year then we had to give them away. They were messy and my family wouldn't eat the eggs. It just wasn't worth it anymore.

~I was a pretty outgoing teenager. I didn't have a whole lot of fear. I worked for a pretty popular radio station all through high school. I was on air a few times and even did a commercial. I was the announcer at many events where I had to get in front of crowds like the battle of the bands, movie premiers, rock concerts, and much more. The best part was being able to hang out with different rock bands when they came into town. I got asked out on a date by the lead singer of 7 Mary 3 (here is a song in case you don't remember who they are), hung out with Queensryche (check out this song to remember them) for a few days. I played baseball with them in front of a crowd of thousands. I got to meet Don Shanks who played Michael Myers from Halloween #5 and Diamond Dallas. Life was pretty interesting back then, but I am so grateful that isn't my lifestyle any more. I am much more shy now.

~I organized a walk-a-thon for the Muzak Heart and Soul foundation several years ago. That was tons of fun but so much work. It makes the JDRF walks more meaningful. I am super excited that I am going to be volunteering with the JDRF this year to help get families excited for the walk. Hopefully I will be helpful to them too.

There task completed Shamae.

Now you know way more info about me than you ever wanted to know! :)

Life

2010-02-13T21:57:00.000-08:00

When life gets crazy it is hard for me to post anything. It isn't just finding the time but also narrowing it down to one thing to talk about. I need to come to terms that a bullet point post isn't as horrible as I always feel that it is. I need to remind myself that I don't just blog for my followers (Hi guys!) but I blog to keep a record of our family life and be able to check off one more commandment.

So anyway, here is my bullet point post since I just don't know where to begin to catch up...

~ The school nurse did call me to come fight for the school nurses in front of the school board. Unfortunately I couldn't go. The night they were holding the meeting was the night that jetBlue cancelled a few hundred flights on the East Coast because of some serious snow storms. There was no way I was going to be able to get off work. I feel guilty, like I missed my chance to fight for what I know is right! I don't know what decision was made yet and honestly I am scared to know. I pray that they didn't make the wrong choice!

~ Speaking of work it is I.N.S.A.N.E I am so tired I could scream. Since jetBlue switched to the new operating system I have been required to work a minimum of 7 hours of overtime each week. I feel like that is all that I do...hello it is what I am doing right now. Luckily it is really slow. The pay is good, and I am feeling more confident with the new system, but I miss my family.

~ There is a bit of drama about our medical insurance. To keep it short they cancelled us again. WITHOUT NOTICE might I add. We found out when we were trying to get the kids prescriptions. I have left messages and they won't call me back. I have no answers and I am pretty dang grumpy about it. This means that Little Man won't be able to get his pump until it is all worked out. Hopefully it gets worked out very soon. I hope that it is an easy fix.

~ So Little Dude accidentally got hit in the eye with a bouncy ball the other day. At first his eye looked blood shot and was pretty sore. That night it was painful enough that it woke him up. The next morning was the first time I saw it. It looked as though the eye was bleeding and had filled the blue part of his eye with blood. I made an appointment for him to be seen that day. The Dr. looked at it and basically told us this his eye was bleeding on the inside and what we could see was the bruise it leaves. He looked and made sure there wasn't permanent damage and everything looked ok but he did have one concern, that his pupil wasn't dilating. He put the drops in his eyes to force it to dilate to see if it would work. It did, but as soon as that wore off the next day it was "stuck" and not dilating again. I called the Dr. back and he said there very well could be permanent damage to the nerve. He called in some dilating drops for us to put in his eye 3 times a day for 7 days. This will stop the bleeding in the eye and help the pupil to be forced open so the nerve could heal. Or if worse comes to worse and it is going to be stuck forever they need it stuck in the dilated position. We will not know for sure if this is permanent or not for about a week. Until then he can't play, run, hop, wrestle, or even go to school for a week. He has to wear sunglasses every time he is in bright light, and he has doctor's orders to take it easy. He has been a good sport about it so far. His bestest buddy (the one that accidentally hit him) wrote him the cutest get well card and has even been over with his drawing book to just keep him company while he takes it easy. He is such a good friend to him, and it just makes his so happy to see him. I am pretty sure that he is going to be ok. I think that it just needs time to heal.

~ I have mentioned that my sister in law is getting married in a few weeks. I am so excited for her! I have been asked to be the Maid of Honor so I have been doing my best to help her in any way I can. I took some pictures for her (which you can see at my photography blog if you want to. I did her bridals today so stay tuned for those) and have been busy planning a bridal shower for her. I am on the hunt for a light blue or silver dress, but I am having a very hard time finding the time to go shopping. Even though we are all busy trying to get things together, it will be worth it!

~ My grandfather turned 80 today. We were able to go to a dinner celebration tonight with my family. My dad put together the most touching video for him. While watching it I got choked up thinking about how wonderful of a man he is. He has always been so fun and such an amazing example. My father has been taught many of the traits that my grandfather has and tonight I couldn't feel more blessed to have these wonderful men in my life. It was a wonderful evening!

~ I am trying so hard to come up with something super fun for my 10 year wedding anniversary next week. I am currently accepting any ideas so please shoot them my way if you can think of something!

~ And lastly for now (since I am now off work, and my hubby is waiting to watch a movie with me) I wanted to tell my hubby how much I love him. He means the world to me. He works so hard for us yet he is always trying to do fun things as a family. Happy Valentines Trev! I love you!

School

2010-02-02T14:15:00.000-08:00

I got word yesterday that the school district is making cuts. They want to cut the use of the school nurse aids.

There is one school nurse for each school. Well actually she is the nurse for several different schools. She is rarely at the school that my kids go to. They have 2 aids that switch off weeks and come in and test Princess every day at 10:15. They have another diabetic boy in the 2nd grade that they test too. This has made my life much easier for more than one reason. I can't imagine going to the school every day at 10:15 to test her. Don't get me wrong, I would if I had to, but it has been very nice to have these ladies go in and test her. They are knowledgeable and already know what to do. In fact they are the only ones in the school that are trained to give insulin when needed. If they aren't there to test her the office staff can test and give a snack if she is low, but giving insulin and administering the glucagon is out of the question.

The thought of them not being there really stinks. It isn't only because I don't want to be there every day to test her, it is more than that. The office staff has way more things to do than to worrying about her well being. I am afraid that they would forget to test her when she needs to be and heaven forbid they give insulin wrong. The office staff isn't a trained medical professional and I don't feel that I should have to put my child's medical condition in their hands.

I keep thinking, when she is in school full time next year I will pretty much be spending my day at the school. Morning check 10:15, lunch 12:45, recess and gym in the afternoons. She is good at managing her diabetes herself, but I haven't taught her how to give herself insulin. She is only 5 it just seems too young for me.

I have been asked to write a letter to the school board to see if somehow I can stop them from cutting the aide's job. They also asked if I would be willing to go before the board and plead for them to not make the cut. (Why me?)

How do other schools handle this? What do I say? Options? Really I feel so lost with this. Not sure what to say or do.

The Potty Training Report. And a Happy 4 year Blog-aniversary to me!

2010-02-01T08:46:00.000-08:00

Exactly 4 years ago today I started the Mommy Going Crazy blog. I had a few friends telling me I should start a blog so I sat down one day and set it all up. Then I went to post my first post and didn't know what to say. So I didn't post anything and went on with my day. Ironically, I was potty training my oldest son at that time and he kept having accidents on the floor. My very first post was about poop! LOL! You can read it here.

Now today I am potty training my last child and this post is going to be about poop too! LOL!

Without further "apoo" (I think I am so funny some times!)

I can't believe how this all started still, but I am happy to report that Little Man is doing AMAZING with potty training. It has been a day and a half since he has had an accident. I think my goal of potty training him in under a week is looking pretty good! However, he has only pooped in the potty once. The other times have been in his underwear. Once he can get that down then I will consider it done.

The way we potty train there are no more diapers ever again and we don't use pull ups. This includes at night. Before, when thinking about potty training my newly diagnosed Little Man, I worried about this. High blood sugars + underwear at night + a glass of milk before bed = too much potential for accidents. But he has never had an accident at night! He has woken up every night to go in the potty! I couldn't be more proud!

It really must have been his time.

The Endo....

2010-01-30T10:41:00.001-08:00

DUN DUN DUUNNNN (enter mysterious music here)

I was talking to my friend, NaTasha, on my home from taking the kids to the Endocrinologist yesterday and once she found out where I had been she asked "So was the 'Good Mommy' report ok today?" Let me translate, the only info she really knows about diabetes is what I have taught her. She knows how I feel about the kids A1c and how I automatically relate it to my self esteem. (more on why I do this in a minute) Her little joke about it being my "Good Mommy" report actually made me laugh, mostly because I had good news to report. Not that the appointment wasn't stressful, because it totally was, but their A1c's are not as bad as I had expected.

When I picked the Princess up from school and told her where we were going she almost instantly got grumpy. It came out of left field since she has always loved going to see Dr. Chad and Dr. Swinyard (They really are THE best doctors in the world. I can't say that enough!) She just pouted the entire way there, but when we walked into the office, she flipped out. Need I remind you that she is almost 6? A little too big (in my mind) to be throwing fits like this in public. Problem is though, she has been doing this a lot lately. Imagine this, we where at the bridal store with my sister in law looking at wedding dresses. A 5 year old girl's dream. Something didn't go her way and she ended up on the floor in the middle of the store kicking her feet and screaming and crying. I immediately tested her blood sugar and it was perfectly normal. I was shocked. I tried to deal with it the best I could and put her in a time out and talked to her, but it took her a good 15 - 20 minutes to calm down. Then a few nights later I was trying to get her to drink a glass of milk and she did the same thing. She even headbutted me and made my lip bleed. I went to bed so mad and confused. So in a small way I was happy the Dr. office could witness what was going so I could ask a few questions about it. Problem is though this terrible mood was picked up my my Little Man and he was throwing a fit too. By the time Dr. Chad came in to see us I was sitting in the room crying. We were all a bit of a mess. We talked for a bit and he offered some help. He said that it might be nothing more than her just throwing a fit...being moody. But it could be more (I agree and that is what I was afraid of) nothing major but just stress of life (a hem, is this not all my life consists of?) compounded with 2 kids being diabetic and all of us, including the kids, are in survival mode trying to cope with everything. Our family is just going through a lot right now. So he gave me a few numbers to social workers that deal mainly with families/kids/adolescence/ that have diabetes. He said to see if we can take the family in and find a way to all work through it. This may or may not be needed but I tell you what, I am more that willing to give it a try. I need a little fresh air and this just might be the only way I can find it so I am calling on Monday.

When Dr. Chad and I were talking he said "We all know that even under the stress of life you and your husband are doing a great job. We know this because 'Princess' A1c is 7.4 and 'Little Man's' is at 5.8." I was pretty excited to hear those numbers, but don't get me wrong the first thought that went through my head was "that is why I let the A1c's determine my self esteem because the doctor in a way does." Not that this is bad. For all he knows I could be at home letting my kids eat whatever they want and put on their log sheets whatever I want. The only true test is that darn A1c. Thankfully they are pretty good even after the longest and hardest 2 months of my life.

So we made a few changes with both kids. We all left with smiles mostly because the kids got candy and a toy and I got some help. It was a rough visit, but as NaTasha put it "It seems that it had to happen that way so you could find the answers that you truly needed." She is right!

Little Man is not so little anymore.

2010-01-29T08:26:00.000-08:00

We ran out of diapers the night before last night so when my Little Man woke up and needed his diaper changed I thought "I might as well potty train him." He is the same age that I potty trained my other kids so I had thought about doing it sometime soon, but I hadn't planned on doing it yesterday. I wanted to wait a bit. The poor kid has been through a lot in the last few months. First we take away his binky in October (which he was totally attached to) then in November he was diagnosed with Diabetes. I didn't want to change his entire life around in just a few short months. But out of necessity, I kind of did need to do it, or go to the store at 5 in the morning. So I thought I would give it a try.

When I posted on facebook that I was potty training my friend Holly called me a "potty training ninja." (love you Holly!) This comment came right as I was headed out the door to go buy some diapers. LOL! We started and I thought he wasn't ready. I was backing out. Until I read that and thought I can't stop now. That is going against I have ever said about potty training. So I didn't give in and we kept going with it. (thanks Holly!)

I am happy to report that he hasn't had an accident at all in almost 24 hours. He even went potty at the store and the best of all he woke daddy up in the middle of the night to go. No accidents at night even without a diaper or pull up! YAY!

I am super proud of him. I guess he was ready after all!

I am still waiting a few days to see if I can say he was potty trained in one day or not....remember less than one week is my goal. I want to see if he regresses at all today or not. I will give my final thoughts on this in a few days.

Wish us luck!

2010-01-28T14:26:00.000-08:00

(Ignore the not so good quality of this picture. Thanks so much)

I over heard her tell her little brother the other day "You're going to grow up to be a really great guy some day! "

As much as I would like to think I "get it" when I talk to other people that are living with diabetes I just can't to it's fullest. But these two can really say to each other that they get it!

That just might be the only reason I would be grateful to have more than one diabetic child.

2010-01-27T16:26:00.000-08:00

I had to copy and paste Amy's comment, just because I love it! I did miss some fun things!! Reading this totally makes me laugh! Thanks Amy, I love you!

"Wow!!! What a good recounting of the crazy events!!! You forgot to mention our matching Target hats, the elevator/urinal, NaTasha almost puking from car sickness, signs on EVERY shop door stating "We DO NOT SELL UMBRELLAS OR RAIN BOOTS!",the dead dog story (sniff, poor Waldo), asking every passerby WHERE they got their cute galoshes, are Creme de la Crepe...that smelled like moldy dog! hahaha Obviously I had a SUPER time too!!! I love you so much and I am so glad we got to blow off a little steam! We are DEFINITELY going again!!! <3"

Ahhh...I love these girls!

2010-01-27T13:32:00.000-08:00

Dear NaTasha and Amy,

I had the best time in Long Beach with you! We should do it once a week. Ok maybe once a month! Either way, we MUST do it again! I came home feeling refreshed and like me again.

There aren't many people that can say they flew to Long Beach, spent the entire day chatting in the hotel room and watching TV and still loved it! The shopping the next day was awesome too! Even in the pouring rain! Too bad we never did find the golashes, but I think I came home with THE coolest umbrella ever!

I am still thanking the heavens above for my cat like reflexes that saved our lives when I realized I was driving down the street going the wrong way, and for Karen the Computer Wife (aka the GPS) for helping us get back on track when I missed the freeway exit twice in a row.

There are a few things that will never be the same though. Like making waffles. Who knew they were so hard to make? And my elbow. With holding the extra small umbrella and everything else in my hand I swear I didn't see that pole right in front of me. Too bad my face was the last thing to see it.

I can't stop laughing about our miss-booking for our 2 double beds for our 2nd night there! Expedia really needs to be told that the "Dreamcatcher Room" is not suitable for 3 adult, heterosexual woman, and that it infact does NOT have 2 double beds. The owners were really nice and it was cute despite the 2 headless women in the hallway. Honestly, there would have been a better story to tell if we actually did stay there. I think I better keep the "theme rooms" for a stay with just me and my hubby! LOL!

We need to be grateful that this trip was still able to happen. I can't believe that the night before we left the airport was closed down because it had flooded. We made it though and walking through a river to get inside the airport was not really all that bad. The stress of the flight home was a little more than I could bear. Leaving the two of you to sleep in the airport (since you refused to spend the night together in the "lover's lounge") was not what I wanted to do. THANK GOODNESS they packed us all onto that flight like sardines. Well maybe I felt a little more like a sardine because I was strapped to a board at the very back of plane squished next to 2 other strangers, and left to fly backwards. Did I tell you yet that flying jumpseat isn't very fun? Who cares though, because we all made it home together!

Really, let's do this again soon!

Much Love,
Shannon

Wanna know?

2010-01-26T19:18:00.000-08:00

Incase you care...

~My laptop doesn't have photoshop on it. I can't post pictures here cuz all I shoot in is RAW and I can't resize them. Hence the lack of "cuteness" on my blog.

~I am happy today. Really happy. And I don't know what makes today any different than any other not so fun day, but I am taking it! It has been awhile.

~My sister in law got engaged and I am SUPER DUPER happy for her! She is marrying a great guy and they will live happily ever after. I am sure of that!

~My trip to Long Beach was FANTASTIC!! I needed to just go away and hang out. We went on a 2 day hunt for golashes and umbrellas. I bought THE last umbrella in all of Southern California and it was a Lightning McQueen one. Little Man was one happy camper when I brought it home! I honestly loved every minute of my little getaway! Next time I am hoping to hop on a plane and getaway with my hubby. Now wouldn't that be awesome?

~My little speech for the JDRF was rescheduled. Someone got word that I was coming and started to 2nd guess the whole thing all together. Ok not really, but I was getting really excited about it. Now I just have more time to polish my lame jokes and find a talent for not crying in public.

~Little Dude has found a series of books that have him totally engrossed in reading lately. Anyone ever read The Adventures of Captain Underpants? I swear they were written for him. I even laugh out loud when reading them. Reading time is quite enjoyable at our house lately.

~I found out why Little Dude has been sneaking so much food lately. First let me tell you that he doesn't know how to tell anyone that he feels low yet. The only thing that I have been able to catch on to is when he says "Mommy, I need you." That means that he is a not well. But I have realized that when he has been getting into the food he is low. This has been hard for me to catch on to, but lately when I test him after he has gotten into the food he hasn't gone "too" high. I think that his breakfast carb ratio is too high. We shall see, a few more days of monitoring really close and I might need to make a few changes.

~I am totally addicted to The Bachelor. I don't even know how it happened. It got recorded on my DVR on accident and now my hubby and I find ourselves on the couch every week. Insane I tell you. But don't worry my heart still belongs to American Idol.

~My kids woke up this morning with some really tough questions that they wanted me to answer while I was still half asleep. Really! Check it out! The VERY first thing my Princess asks me before she is even out of bed all the way "Why do we need belly buttons?"

There now you know just about everything there is to know about my last week. Consider yourself updated by another really lame bullet point post.

your welcome :)

Call me crazy....

2010-01-19T20:34:00.000-08:00

It's ok everyone else does.

But I feel I have a few good excuses.

The first being diabetes.

The second is having two kids with diabetes.

Ok I know I use that as an excuse for everything. I find myself telling random people to "Oh just ignore my crazy children. They are a little high right now."

Never do I realize that person doesn't get it.

However, I do enjoy the times when I ask the kids in public if they are high and someone hears it then gives me a nasty look. Do they REALLY TRULY think that my 5 year old and 2 year old are ACTUALLY high on drugs? Come on! These are moments every parent of a diabetic has and enjoys. Call it one of the very few perks.

I have been reading over some of my blog posts lately and I have decided reading my blog isn't any fun anymore. All I do is complain or talk about diabetes. Or complain about diabetes. I do have a life outside of diabetes. And believe it or not, I actually do have another child. You may not remember though, he is the older non-diabetic one. Poor kid has been getting the shaft here on my blog. Lots of things are actually. I kind of miss posting about non diabetic things.

But don't fear, I am leaving diabetes all together for a few days. When I get back I am going to be refreshed and ready to be my old self again. Hopefully anyway. And if not then you can just keep calling me crazy.

A few questions.

2010-01-14T08:02:00.000-08:00

Ok I have a few questions for some of my D-moms out there.

#1 We got a blood ketone tester and I am still trying to figure out what the results mean. My tired little brain just can't seem to understand the instructions book.

#2 It seems like my Little Man can not stop eating! I am sure that being 2 and being restricted to when he can eat makes him want to rebel and eat all the time. But how do I know that I am not starving him?

and last but not least

#3 How do we do this everyday and stay sane again?

Love you guys! Thanks in advance for all your help!

Bullet Point Update....because I am to lazy to do anything else.

2010-01-12T18:48:00.001-08:00

It is so hard for me to concentrate on anything lately. Which is why I haven't been blogging very much. I felt I needed to at least do an update to keep this blog going. So here you go another bullet point update.

- There was a HUGE weight lifted off my shoulders today. As some of you know as of Jan. 1st our insurance for the kids had to be reviewed. I was afraid that we weren't going to qualify due to income circumstances. Since the care for both of my diabetics alone costs me more than my mortgage payment, this has been something that I have been VERY stressed over. I got a call from them this morning basically telling me we didn't qualify. I cried on the phone...with a guy...a stranger.... I felt pretty pathetic. But he kept asking more questions about our income and such and found out there we do indeed qualify!!! But only for a few more months. I will take it. Then stress about it in April! I can't tell you how happy this made me!

- So since we will now have insurance for a few more months that means that my little man can get a pump next month!!!! He isn't ready for it, but we are still going to get it for when he is ready. Since the insurance covers it 100% we figure now is the time to get it.

- My hubby has been working lots of hours lately. This is great news for us. Last year at this time (and pretty much all year long) hours were a little hard to come by. I am super proud of him handling it the way he does and his willingness to work hard for our family! I love that guy!

-Speaking of my hubby he is training to do a triathlon this summer. He has been running and working out like crazy! He has been loving it! I can't wait to cheer him on!

- I got an email today from the JDRF asking if my Princess, my Little Man and I would be willing to speak at a luncheon for all the Merit Medical employees in a few weeks. I guess they have agreed to sponsor the Walk for a Cure this year and they are having a luncheon to kick off the fundraising and they wanted a family come in and talk about our lives with diabetes and why we want a cure. I am scared and honored to do this! I cried when I got the email. How am I going to stand in front of 100+ people and talk about it without loosing it? Oh well, go for the impact I guess! Princess can't wait for it!

- My new work schedule is in full swing and so far I love it! I get Saturday's off and even better I get to go back to church! I love it!

- My Little Dude is amazing! Super helpful and super smart. I have been finding things all over the house lately of him drawing pictures and writing captions on them. He even started writing a book. I can't tell you how creative he is! I will have to scan the pages in so you can see them! I am so proud of him and the success he has had this year!

- Although he is a good kid, Dude is feeling sort of a minority lately. He keeps saying things like "the diabetics are in the other room, can I have a bowl of ice cream?" Even though he doesn't have diabetes he is still trying to learn a new way of life right now too!

- I have been trying to hold things together here. I don't feel I am doing the greatest job most days and I try to not fall into a pit of depression, but when something wonderful happens there is much celebration! I have been trying to love myself more and not be so hard on myself and each day is a struggle. I am so thankful for friends and family that are supporting me and guiding me each day! I would have fallen hard a long time ago if it weren't for the wonderful people in my life.

- So I think that I might need to go get my thyroid checked again. I have been feeling really sluggish and tired almost all the time. I can't concentrate on anything for too long and I keep forgetting things. Maybe it is my environment, but I have a feeling it is my thyroid giving me problems again. Maybe it is a mixture of both!

- Last Saturday we had a day filled with taking pictures, and it wasn't me taking them this time (which was kind of nice actually) My parents, siblings and all of our kids had a big family picture taken. It was really fun and I can't wait to see them! Then shortly after we ran to Sugarhouse Park and the photographer for the Utah Jazz took our pictures for the JDRF. That was really cool too! They just took pictures of us playing. I can't wait to see those too!

Well ok, that is enough for tonight. Gotta go check blood sugar, make sure homework and reading got done, the get kids ready for bed.

If you made it this far through my long boring post you deserve a cookie! Oh and a thank you! THANKS!

2010-01-06T08:55:00.000-08:00

I am so tired.

Diabetes is a beast sometimes.

I wish I could just forget about it sometimes.

I have so much to say but all my mind can muster most of the time is planning when I get to take a nap.

Maybe diabetes isn't the culprit, maybe there is something wrong with me.

I guess going to bed after 12 doesn't help.

Looking for Santa.

2009-12-17T10:50:00.000-08:00

I left my computer unattended for just a few minutes.

When I came back I saw my kids all huddled around my computer looking at it. I asked them

what they were up to and this is what I found typed into the google search bar....

"wer is sata"

You know... Where is Santa?

Christmas time is the best don't you think?

Work Hazzard.

2009-12-14T08:34:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite parts of my JetBlue training class when I first got my job was when security came in and talked to us about why airports have certain rules and what terrorists have tried to do in the past. I know this sounds crazy but honestly I was appalled by how people would try to blow sometime up, or how they would try to smuggle prohibited items onto the aircraft. All I could think is that there are some CRAZY people in this world.

In part of that training they handed out yellow cards to everyone that had a list of questions on it. Questions like Where is it right now? What does it look like? Did you place it? and my favorite What will cause it to explode? This is a Bomb threat card that is intended to be placed by every computer in case of someone calling in a bomb threat. I got the card and neatly tucked it into my desk and thought "OH I am never going to need this."

Well yesterday when I actually received a bomb threat at work the last thing I was thinking about is that crazy yellow card.

It was my last call of the day and I answer with me same "Thank you for calling JetBlue. This is Shannon how can I help you today?" and the person on the other end of the phone started telling me about JetBlue flight #___ going from ___ to ___ today will have a bomb on it. (I will not put the flight info in here just to be safe but she did say very specific which flight.) Then she repeated it again. My tired little brain was trying to process what she just said "did I really just hear what I thought I heard?" Crap! That is exactly what I heard. I started to say something but she mumbled something to me really fast then hung up. The phone call was exactly 19 seconds long.

I panicked.

I reported it like I was supposed to. Then shut down my computer and went upstairs totally shaken. I figured that most likely it was a hoax, or someone that was really mad, but I kept thinking what if it wasn't? Well, I did what I was supposed to do and that was that.

Or so I thought.

A little while later I got a call from Security saying that they had reviewed the phone call and they are taking it very seriously. (they have to even if it is a hoax) She asked if I was ok. I told her I was shaken, but I was alright. Then she said (as a joke I might add) "how does it feel to have been called a nasty name by a terrorist?" WHAT??? I must have missed that. She said that at the end when she was mumbling something she called me a nasty name. I had no idea I was still trying process what had happened. Kind of funny if you ask me though.

I was a little nervous all day. I kept checking on the flight to see if it was ok. I knew my nerves weren't going to calm down until it landed safely. It looked fine all day right up until it was supposed to depart then it was delayed. It got a little bit more delayed while in the air, but it did arrive safely.

And I was able to go to sleep sound knowing I foiled a terrorist plan.....ok maybe not.

Low

2009-12-12T19:24:00.000-08:00

One year ago (almost to the day) we experienced a low blood sugar of 29 and I hoped to never ever see that number again.

Well today I was working when Little Dude came down and without a saying a word (he knows he will get in big trouble if he says anything while I am on the phones) he wrote on my white board next to me that said.....

Princess (well her real name) 29

I put my phone on mute and asked him if that we her blood sugar. He said it was but daddy was taking care of it.

I had a break after that call so I ran upstairs to see what happened. Apparently after her breakfast the Princess got into the bath. When she had gotten out of the bath she yelled to her daddy to come get her dressed. He was in the middle of something so he asked her if she could do it herself. I guess she yelled back to him that she couldn't and she needed him to test her. He said he went into her room and she was laying on the floor naked, still soaking wet, and not really moving. He tested her and she was at 29.

I hate lows like this. They are so scary! It took her a little while to start feeling better, but the image of her laying naked on the floor not able to do anything is haunting my brain. The what ifs won't stop. I have kept a close eye on her all day since her day has been filled with lows.

The little turkey knows it too so guess what she did this evening? We were headed out somewhere and I was trying to round up the kids. I couldn't find her. Her coat and shoes were still out but she was no where to be found. I started to panic that she was passed out somewhere and started to yell her name and looking all over for her. When I walked into the hallway she opened the closet and came out. She thought she was being tricky to play a prank on mommy. I laughed, but I had to tell her how I really was worried about her. Silly girl.

The Circle of Friends Award

2009-12-11T09:15:00.000-08:00

Oh, I am so lucky to have been tagged by two friends for the Circle of Friends Award. Thank you Meri and Shamae!

In accepting this award I need to list 5 things that I am grateful for. This list is easy to come by since I have so many things I am grateful for! So in no particular order here is my list.

1~ My Hubby. I am grateful for his sense of humor, and his love of movies, baking, gardening and canning. He picks up the pieces when I feel overwhelmed. He works very hard for this family and everything that we have. He holds me at night and plays with my hair while he trys to fall asleep, and I love it. Everything about him makes me grateful that we will be together for ever.

2~ My kids. I love how creative and fun they are. I love that they still like to cuddle and I love that they are always trying to make each other laugh. They are always on the move, but I am grateful that they would rather be outside playing (even when it is 9 degrees outside) than sitting in the house playing video games. They are helpful and thoughtful too. I have learned a lot from my kids and I am grateful they were sent to our family.

3~ The rest of my family. I can honestly say that I wouldn't be where I am today without them. They have helped me in so many ways. Each one of them are an example to me in some way. I cherish each relationship I have with them.

4~The Gospel. My testimony is what assures me that I am not alone in my trials. There is a greater plan for me and my family and without that knowledge I don't know how I could go on.

5~ The D-mom community. They have shed tears with me when Little Man was diagnosed. They have sent supplies to me when I refused to use the horrible infusion sets. They send me comments and messages of encouragement at the times I most need it. They have offered advice and support beyond measure. And they have laughed with me when it is time to stop crying and look at the joy in life. Diabetes isn't something that I thought would be a part of our family, but I won't change these friendships for the world.

Now it is my turn to award 5 people.

Tristan

Tracie :)

Greg and Angie

and I just checked and all the other D-mom's have been tagged....if I have missed you, please consider this your official tag.

Insurance

2009-12-09T16:50:00.000-08:00

Alright so I have some good news and bad news about our insurance issues. I know most of you may not really even care, but I know there are some that will rejoice with me!

First let me start off by saying that we are in the middle of trying to get qualified for insurance again. I woke up half way to a panic attack early this morning. I had been dreaming about insurance issues and stuff so it must have sent my body into fight mode. Crappy thing is that it is real life stuff that I was dreaming about...I wish it were a dream. So really the panic hasn't really gone away yet. I am so paranoid that we won't have insurance again after the end of this month! This is where I need to learn to have more faith! It will work out. I know that it always does.

Anyway back to the good and bad news.

The bad.

We have been trying to get Little Man a pump before the end of the month. Not that he is ready to use it, but just so we will have it in case we don't get qualified for insurance. We thought things would be ok until I got a call saying that they require 3 months of glucose logs showing that we test him more than 3 times a day. Since he was diagnosed in November we have to wait until February to get the pump. This is where I am praying and praying and praying that we have insurance after this month!

So on to the good.

In that same phone call I was telling the lady about the Dr. note that I have stating my Little Princess can not use the infusion sets the insurance will cover. I really just wanted to know where I needed to send it to. She told me that they initially did it to save money but they have since realized that it wasn't saving any money in the long run. The infusion sets only last 2 days so they were needing to pay for more supply and this wasn't saving them money. PLUS (get this!) They had SO MANY COMPLAINTS about the pain, bruising, and bleeding that they were causing that they realized they needed to change back! YAY! They do have a heart! So this means that the insurance will now cover the GOOD infusion sets again! We are so happy! But again... this isn't going to do me any good if I don't have insurance next month! BUT STILL YAY!!!!!

Mommy Going Crazy....a year at one glance.

2009-12-05T19:24:00.000-08:00

I was sitting here tonight reading some of my older posts. I love doing that. I love being taken back into my own history. Things get forgotten as time goes by so to step back into that time and place again is refreshing to me. I quickly realize how far we have come, how blessed we are, and how time is so so precious. This is the reason why I blog people! It is my personal history.

So much has happened this year. I still don't quite know how to feel about all of it yet. So many things haven't worked themselves out yet. Then there are those things that I can clearly see why they happened. I see the highs and lows and I am not sure where I stand most of the time. But then I look to my right, then to my left and I see my amazing husband and my adorable kids right there next to me. That is all that matters. Who cares where we are on the path, as long as we are all traveling together right?

As I mentioned before this year has been full of emotion, trials, blessings, and miracles. With the new year right around the corner, and the celebration of the first 10 years of our family coming soon, I felt that we needed to honor 2009 and the lessons learned within it. By doing so I want to share with you my favorite post of the year.

~Impromptu. Posted on Jan. 19, 2009

~When I was a kid... Posted on Feb. 19, 2009

~Never Never Land vs Reality Posted on March 16, 2009

~She can do it. Posted March 24, 2009

~The Office. Posted on April 9, 2009

~I know you were all dying to know. Posted April 10, 2009

~Tis the season for baseball. Posted May 1, 2008

~It broke my heart. Posted May 5, 2009

~Struggle. Posted June 1, 2009

~Weekly Bon Fire. Posted June 25, 2009

~Family Adventure -Deer Valley Picnic. Posted July 6, 2009

~This Girl Has a Story. Posted on Aug. 4, 2009

~Him. Posted Sept. 15, 2009

~Sundays. Posted Sept. 20, 2009

~Simple but true. Posted Oct. 6, 2009

~The Anniversary. Posted Nov. 11, 2009

~The Day Actually Came. Posted Nov. 16, 2009

Each of my posts have a special meaning to me, but each post on this list means so much more.

I am really looking forward to 2010. It might be a little too early still, but I am going to say it anyway....2010 is "THE YEAR". You know THE year for success, for health, for hopefully a little less stress, a little more learning, a lot more loving and tons more giving back. And if not, then I will forever be grateful for what I learn along the way with whatever happens.

2009-12-03T19:15:00.001-08:00

The endo went well today. It seemed we were there forever and I kept my cool the entire time.

Here are the stats:

Little Princess
She is always high. Always. So in the last few weeks we have changed everything. Her carb ratios, her basal rates, and her correction amounts. It seems nothing works. Her A1c is now 8.3. Higher, but it could be worse. And like I said before, I totally saw this coming. We just have to keep changing things until we get it right. The doctor assured me that it isn't anything that we are doing wrong. It is just because she is coming out of (or is officially out of) her honeymoon stage.

We talked again about the infusion sets. He said there is another patient of his that is having the same problems. He wrote us a letter to provide to the insurance company stating that we can't use the other ones because it causes bleeding, redness, bruising, and more frequent changes. He said that if that doesn't work he will see what else he can do. This was pretty good news to me!

Little Man
He is still doing good. His A1c is 5.8. Pretty dang good! We caught the diagnosis so early on that he will have a pretty long honeymoon stage. He does get insulin at every meal. It is a super small amount at 1/4 of a unit for every 20 carbs he eats. (and since most doctors don't go into the 1/4 units that would be 1 unit for every 80 carbs. See I told you it was a small amount) He isn't using Lantus or any other long lasting insulin. If we weren't giving him insulin at meals though he would have a much higher A1c. There have been a few times that he has snuck foods and his blood sugar jumps up way high. So if we can just keep things going the way we are for awhile then we can take the stress off his pancreas and hopefully his honeymoon will last a little while longer.

We are ordering him a pump though. We hopefully will have it by the end of the month. He won't be using it just yet, but since we don't know what we are going to be doing about insurance at the end of the month we wanted to get it while it was paid for. That way we will be prepared for when the time comes that he will need it.

He is still learning to be brave. He really doesn't mind the finger pokes too much. But when it comes time to give the insulin shot he kicks and screams. It takes one of us to hold him and the other to give the shot. It hurts to have to do that, but someday he will get used to it. Then way later down the road he will understand that we do it to keep him healthy. He is starting to ask how many carbs are in foods though. It makes me laugh that a 2 year old thinks about that kind of stuff.

So there we have it. Another diabetes related post. Sometime I will be able to write about something else. Hey maybe I will post about Dude's new found talent! That kid is AMAZING! Stay tuned for that one, you will be blown away!

Happy Endo Appointment Day!

2009-12-03T09:10:00.000-08:00

With two diabetic kids in our house this might as well be a holiday right? The day where our world of school, work, cleaning and playing stands still while we make the 2.5 mile trip to the Endocrinologist for the afternoon.

When it was just the Princess that was diabetic, going to the Endo caused enough stress for me to last a week. Worried about changes, what the doctor was going to say and then there is the DREADED A1c. OH THE STRESS OF THE A1C! And now there are two! Two A1c's to worry about!

How did I go from worrying about my hair, outfit or makeup to determine my self esteem to that crazy A1c number?

Well I tell you what. I am not going to worry today. Cuz' I know I am doing the best I can. I know November wasn't perfect. I was there when the Princess was so sick because of high glucose numbers with the lovely ketones that followed. I was also there when the Little Man was diagnosed with diabetes. And I even had to install a lock on the pantry door because I saw the effects of what my son's love of Cheerios has on his blood sugar when he sneaks a hand full of them. Our life flipped all around again this month and I just can't be expected to be perfect....right?

So this afternoon when I take the Princess and Little Man to see the Endo I am going to walk in there calmly. I am not going to get after the kids when they start playing with the window coverings, or taking out all the books. I am not going to get grumpy when the A1c's come back and they are higher than expected. I am just going to tell myself with every step out of the office and across the bridge to my car that I AM DOING THE BEST THAT I CAN! And leave it at that!

And maybe, JUST MAYBE we will come home and eat cookies. Just to prove that I am still in control.

As if you really wanted to know this about me.

2009-11-29T16:26:00.000-08:00

My computer threatened to die on me the other day. Ok actually it really is on it's way out. (I need to hurry and back everything up while I can) But I didn't have a chance to read anyone's blogs until today. I read that Chasiti tagged me to do this. So now it is my turn for me to tell you a bunch of useless crap about me! Ha Ha!

1. Do you like bleu cheese? No way! Can't stand even the thought. I am really picky about my food and anything that has to do with mold.

2. Have you ever smoked? No. Gross.

3. Do you own a gun? Hubby has one. He wishes he had more.

4. Favorite type of Food? This is easy, by far Mexican...or lettuce wraps from Pei Wei. YUMMY!

5. Favorite type of music? I love music and will pretty much listen to anything.

6. What do you think of hot dogs? I think they are fine. Love to give them to the kids for a low carb lunch.

7. Favorite Christmas movie? Christmas Vacation.

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Water.

9. Can you do push ups? Not many, but some.

10. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry? My wedding ring.

11. Favorite hobby? Hummm....blogging, photography, sleeping...oh that isn't a hobby? Ok fine. There are some that I used to do that I totally miss like Mtn. Biking, snowboarding, and playing the guitar.

12. Do you have A. D. D.? Quite the opposite actually. I think that I am a little too laid back. I wish that I could be a little more ADD about some things then maybe they will get done.

13. Do you wear glasses/contacts? Yea, but only when I have to. I hate wearing them. It seems as though I would rather not see then put contacts in or wear my glasses.

14. Middle name? I am actually pretty proud of my middle name....Rae.

15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment: 1) that cologne that my 2 year old got into smells like poop when that is all that you can smell. 2) can't wait for our Sunday night Holiday Movie night. 3) I have the best friends and family a girl could ever ask for.....can I add a 4th? This is my thing so I am adding it....4)I really want another piece of pie my hubby made. It is SO YUMMY!

16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink: Dr. Pepper, Crystal Light, water

17. Current worry? Seriously? Do ANY of you have the time for me to list my current worries? If anyone has read my blog in the past 2 years you will know my current worries....or even read it in the last 2 weeks for that matter. I am not listing them....I will totally sound pathetic.

18. Current hate right now? The smell of that NASTY cologne. Why does he have to get into everything? Silly boy.

19. Favorite place to be? Doing anything with my hubby and kids.

20. How did you bring in the new year? Watching movies and eating yummy treats at our house. I loved having my sister in law here from Texas. I hope she can be here again this year!

21. Someplace you’d like to go? Anywhere JetBlue flys to. I want to be able to say I have used my benefits sometime.

22. Name three people who will complete this. I have been away from the blogging world for a few too many days and I have no idea who hasn't done it. I guess if you are one of them, consider yourself tagged. :)

23. Do you own slippers? Do I own slippers? What a funny question actually. Last year when my princess was diagnosed my friend Cari took me shopping. She bought me a cute pair of slippers and said that life is better when you have a cute pair of slippers. A few weeks ago when my little Man was in the hospital she brought me another pair. Now I have two cute pairs to remind me how sweet life is....when you have a pair of slippers.

24. What color shirt are you wearing? Green and white

25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? No. I hate getting in them slipping right back out.

26. Can you whistle? Yes, my princess is the master at it. She will whistle non stop!

27. Where are you now? Home, watching my hubby play Pain on the PlayStation.

28. Would you be a pirate? What a strange question, but I think I would get sea sick.

29. What songs do you sing in the shower? I don't sing much in the shower, I do math....Long story.

30. Favorite Girl’s Name? What we named Little Princess.

31. Favorite boy’s name? What we named Little Dude and Little Man....so what if I don't announce their names on my blog.

32. What is in your pocket right now? Don't have pockets in jammies.

33. Last thing that made you laugh? www.peopleofwalmart.com HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

34. What vehicle do you drive? Chrysler 300 or my Jeep Grand Cherokee

35. Worst injury you’ve ever had? Let's see, I knocked out all 4 of my front teeth when I was really little. It took them almost 5 years to come back in. Or there was the time that I dropped the curling iron in my eye and burned the surface of my eye. Or maybe its the fact that I have broken my right arm 3 times....It's gotta be one of those. :)

36. Do you love where you live? Yes, I love it! I don't ever want to move.

37. How many TVs do you have in your house? 3 One in the family room, one in my bedroom then a little tiny one downstairs where we work out.

38. How many computers do you have in your house? 4. My lap top, my hubby's lap top, one in our office, then my work computer.

39. If you changed your job, what would it be? When my kids are all grown up I want to go to school to be a CNA or a Radiology tech.

40. If you were granted three wishes, what would they be? 1) a cure for diabetes so my kids wouldn't have to suffer. 2) that we could never worry about finances again 3) That we could travel more as a family.

The Not So Good Infusion Sets

2009-11-22T18:46:00.000-08:00

Interesting picture I know! But I have to post it.

This is to follow up with the "new" infusion sites we have to use. The first time we used it the site got a little infected and we had to change it after 2 days. The second time we used it this is what happened. Do you see the big bruise where the needle sits? I don't even need to explain the blood.

This stinks!

I plan on using these pictures to show the insurance if I have to. I just don't think I should make her be in pain just because the insurance says we have to use these.

The Stay

2009-11-20T22:50:00.000-08:00

You wouldn't think that I would go to the hospital without my camera would you?

It amazes me that in every picture Little Man has a smile...or a silly face. He was trying SO hard to be brave. He still hates getting pokes and will kindly say "Don't poke me daddy!" Or when it comes time to get his insulin he runs across the room and just cries. I try to comfort him after every poke to make sure he still knows that I love him. It isn't easy on either of us. I don't like to give them just as much if not more than he doesn't like getting them. Oh how I wish I could take this away from my children.

Ok so before I get more emotional here are a few pictures and stories from the hospital stay.

Daddy got to spend most of his time at the hospital with him. I hated not being there all the time, but I couldn't ask for anyone better to be with him. I am so thankful for my hubby and all that he does for us! He truly is an amazing man. Little Man was lucky to have him by his side, and lucky to have him in our lives in general.

That cute little teddy bear he is holding was given to him by his little "girl friend" Jessie. So what if Jessie is 13 years old, he LOVES Jessie! He was super happy to see her! We were all happy to see her and her mom and dad! Even if it did take Jessie lying about her age to get into the hospital! (Because of H1N1 all children under 14 are not allowed into the hospital.) I can't believe we were so stressed on minute then the next laughing so hard my sides hurt! It was great medicine for the soul!

Our good friend Matt came by too. It was so awesome of him to come! He even brought Little Man this silly orange monkey that makes the most obnoxious noise ever. The kid LOVES it!

My dear friend Cari came and visited for the afternoon as well. Her care package has been making me smile ever since. When the princess was diagnosed she bought me the cutest slippers and we joked about how things can't be THAT bad if you have a cute pair of slippers! Well among the many things she brought me were a very cute pair of fuzzy pink slippers! I LOVE THEM! She gave Little Man's Mack (his duck) a new name Mac Roni n' Cheese. He is STILL laughing about that! Thanks Cari! You are such a good friend!

He wanted so badly to go run the halls before bed. He was getting restless in his room and just needed some exercise. But after I put his jammies on him he realized there was a hole in the foot. Saying he was annoyed by it doesn't really explain it right. He kept going on and on about how is toe won't stay in. He was majorly bugged by it. So after him telling the 5 or so nurse that he didn't like the hole I asked for a pair of scissors so I could cut the foot off. We gone one off and he was so happy! We went to do the other foot and he refused! Threw a fit was more like it. He was just fine with the way that it was now. So yes, he walked around with one foot cut off his jammies. VERY RED NECK! The nurse did give him some slippers so he would fall on his run! HE HAD A BALL! Even if it was 10:00 at night!

Remember my post about the mural on the wall and the man playing the piano? Well here is a picture of the mural. I almost cried when I saw it again! I am so grateful that I have a picture of it now. It really is a great reminder to me.

You will never guess who was Little Man's nurse? For anyone that has read the post that I wrote a year ago about the Princess' stay in the hospital would know Dan. He colored with her and played with her ALL AFTERNOON! She loved it! Well Dan was our night nurse so they didn't do much playing, but they still had fun! I had to get the proof. He even remembered us!

He had (and still does have) lots of lows. Less now, we have been changing things like crazy still, but he didn't get much sleep. We were packing things up to go home and look what he did.

He fell asleep between the wall and the chair/bed while loving on his Jessie bear. It was so adorable that I had to get a picture!

So there you have it. The stay!

We are trying to not repeat this again next year!

How it all happened

2009-11-20T14:21:00.000-08:00

A few months ago I had a few suspicions that my Little Man was showing signs of being diabetic. Since we saw the Endo every month for his sister I thought I would just talk to him about it. I tested his blood occasionally and would get readings anywhere from 100 to 209.

In May we heard of a study that would test family members of diabetics to see if they have a chance of getting it someday. It is a simple blood test that looks for a certain antibody that shows up as diabetes eventually....or something like that. Honestly I don't really know how it worked but I signed the entire family up for it! Little Dude, Little Man and I went to have the test done in May. Little Man's veins are tiny so they couldn't get enough blood for the test. Dude and I got our results and we are in the clear. I still wanted Little Man to get it though so I set up an appointment for him to go with his daddy in July. Well again they couldn't get enough blood....Daddy is in clear. When he started to show a few more signs of it I really needed to find out more since the next time they were doing the study was in November.

I set up an appointment to go and see the Endo in September. They looked at his glucose numbers that I brought in from the times that I had tested him. They did and A1c and it was 5.6, still normal. But they wanted me to bring him in next month to see how things were going. The end of October I took him in again. Still a few higher glucose number and his A1c went up to 5.9 but still ok. They told me to check him still when he is showing signs and to call if I have any questions.

I called Monday morning because boy oh boy did I have a question....ok really, I already knew what he was going to say. On Sunday night my Little Man had a major melt down over daddy taking away stickers that he was not playing with nicely. He went to a time out after trying to hit is daddy. He sat there and screamed at the top of his lungs. No matter what we did he wouldn't stop. I moved him to his room for him to know that I mean business. He screamed ever louder. I went in and sat on the floor and tried to talk to him. He backed up into his closet and screamed for almost 20 minutes. In that time he would come after me and try to pull my hair or bite me. I happened to look into his eyes and I saw something very frightening. It was all the signs of a high blood sugar and that he was officially not in control. This was far more than just a typical 2 year old melt down. I had the thought to test his blood sugar, but there was no way I was going to do it until he was clam. Finally I just grabbed him and held him in my arms and whispered in his ear. He finally calmed down and I just held him. He sat on my lap for quite some time while I talked to him. A little while later I tested his blood sugar and sure enough...394!

I panicked. I couldn't stop shaking. I kept thinking "he has been caught sneaking candy all afternoon. Maybe that is all that it is." Denial I suppose. I know better. Tears kept coming as I realized what this meant. As soon as I turned on my computer to let my mind escape for a little bit my D-mom friends were chatting and invited my to join. I needed to talk and somehow it worked out that they were right there. All of them, including myself were in tears. We all knew what this meant. What a support it was! I am thankful they were there to help my hubby and I that night! (Yes, he read the entire conversation.)

My hubby held me while I tried to sleep. I couldn't. I just cried. The plan was to call the Dr. in the morning on my first break at work. My hubby and I tested his blood all night until it finally came down to 160 at 4:00 in the morning.

I couldn't work Monday morning. My training class starts at 6:30 so I was tired, but I couldn't stop thinking about it. 8:30 came and I called the Dr. and told the receptionist what was going on, then left a message to have the Dr. call me back. Not even 2 minutes later he called me back and told me that he needed to go to the ER. I stared to sob. I knew I couldn't leave my class. There was no way if I left I was going to loose my job. He told me to go straight from work to his office as soon as I could after work. The rest of my morning was a blur.

I picked him and his sister from the sitter and headed to the Dr. They weighed him. He had lost 1 pound since the end of October. They checked his A1c. It had gone up from 5.9 to 6.2. Going up, but still on the boarder line of ok. The Dr. pretty much knew what was coming, but needed to know how fast. He sent me home to give Little Man as much sugar as possible to put his pancreas to the ultimate test. Then I had orders to take him to Alta View Hospital to do a blood test. He said that if his blood sugar was over 200 his pancreas had failed the test. I did what he said.

Before we were called back to have the blood drawn I pulled out his tester and got a reading of 388.

He had failed the test.

The Dr. called that night and said that it was official he is diabetic. He told us to head up to Primary Children's hospital so they can monitor him while they tried to get the correct insulin doses down. He was admitted on Monday night and sent home Wednesday afternoon.

1 year and 5 days apart from his older sister's diagnosis. Can you believe it? I am still having a hard time believing it myself. But we are good!

More to come....even with pictures next time!

Faith

2009-11-17T23:12:00.001-08:00

I really couldn't think of anything better to name this post other than faith. I live off it everyday. That is what keeps me going. I know without a shadow of a doubt that every trial that our little family has will only make us stronger. It always has and I don't believe that will ever change.

Last year any time someone would mention my daughter's name or even the word diabetes (or anything related) I would break down into and uncontrollable crying mess. My emotions were so raw and no matter what I tried I just couldn't hide them. I was scared. I didn't know that I was cut out to be a mother of a diabetic. I felt I was too irresponsible. Everything was overwhelming.

With the diagnosis of my little man yesterday I fully expected for all those feeling to come up again. Yes, I have had my moments of crying and asking why us...again? But something has happened that has made me stronger. You know what happened? Well in the last year I have learned to have more faith. I have learned to try in everything surrounding me to find how Heavenly Father has stepped in and helped me. You know I have seen those tender mercies everywhere. Even in places that I would never expect. Before I get into how my little man is doing let me share a story that happened to me tonight. I never want to forget this so I feel I must share it.

Little Man wanted to go walk the halls before bed tonight. It was late, almost 10:00. He was in his jammies and just having a ball running and skipping all up and down the halls. My hubby and I were following him and just letting him do his thing. We walked through some doors on the 3rd floor of Primary Children's Hospital into a room just off the elevators where there are some couches and computers and even a piano. The room was dark, and the room almost bare. As soon as we opened the doors the sound of music flew through the air. I immediately recognized the song as "I am a Child of God". The spirit of this song went right through me and made my heart swell and my eyes fill with tears. You see this song has a very special meaning to me. The words are powerful! I could hear the words in my mind as the man played.

I am a child of God,
And he has sent me here,
Has given me an earthly home
With parents kind and dear.
Lead me, guide me, walk beside me,
Help me find the way.
Teach me all that I must do
To live with him someday.

I am a child of God,
And so my needs are great;
Help me to understand his words
Before it grows too late.

I am a child of God.
Rich blessings are in store;
If I but learn to do his will
I'll live with him once more.

I realized (again) that my children where sent here to my husband and I and we have a duty. To teach our children who they are what their place is in this world. Their needs are great. All of them not just the two that are diabetic. But they have many things to accomplish and I need to help teach them to know that the hard things that come up in life are placed in our path the help us grow. There are ways over them and once passed there are blessing beyond measure in store for them.

The tears just flowed as we walked down the dark hallway and pass the elevators. Once back into the light on my left there was a mural on the wall of Jesus Christ holding and teaching the children. What a moment to be shown how incredible faith is and how deeply it is important in our lives. A reminder that every step of the way, through every trial that diabetes has in store, I AM NOT ALONE!

I felt so strongly that I needed to thank the man that was playing the music. I left my hubby and son to look at the mural a little longer. I walked back into the dark room where the rather large, older man sat at the piano with his head humbly down. I went up to him and put my arm around his shoulders and while crying I told him thank you for reminding what I needed. Without a missing a beat he looked up and gave me a huge smile. I walked away and didn't see him again.

I know we will be ok. I am at peace.

My little man is doing great! He has been playing and watching movies all day. He hates all the pokes but he surprised us all with wanting to do it himself tonight. He did it too. Poked himself, put in the test strip and tested his blood. I was a little shocked. This will all come with time and when he and sister have to do it all together I know she will be there for strength.

When I finally was able to get to the hospital after having to work all morning he was so happy to see me. Later in the afternoon I was able to lay down with him and take a very long nap! It was lovely! I really don't want to leave him again in the morning, but I know he understands. Plus he is spending time with daddy and loving every minute of it.

He gets to come home tomorrow (the 18th) even though his blood sugar is really low. The dr. thinks that we will be able to do the rest of the fine tuning at home. We caught it so early that his pancreas is still working pretty good. There will be a time that it will stop all together and we will adjust things when that time comes. The dr. also thinks that there will be a time that he will actually only be given insulin when he his high and that is it. It would be nice, but we will have to see.

I will update when I can again, but since I have to wake up in 3 1/2 hours I need to get some rest. Thanks for all the emails, prayers and love. We love you guys!

The day actually came.

2009-11-16T22:55:00.000-08:00

One year and 5 days ago I was in shock that I had a diabetic child. Today I am in shock that I now have 2 diabetic children.

My Little Man was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes today.

It has been a very long, emotional, and interesting day.

I promise I will post more about it all tomorrow when I get to go to the hospital to sit with him.

It is KILLING me that I can't be there right now! If I was ever going to quit my job today would be the day! Training isn't fun at 6:30 in the morning, but I am guessing it is going to be a little worse thinking about my little man in the hospital and I can't be there with him. Good thing he has an amazing daddy that is staying by his side!

On a totally side note...I got the most amazing gift in the mail today from a fellow D-Mom, blogging friend! WHAT A PERFECT DAY FOR ME TO GET SUCH AN AWESOME GIFT CELEBRATING WORLD DIABETES DAY! I am going to wear it all day tomorrow....maybe even the next day! THANK YOU NICOLE!

Goodnight world and good night to Halloween and trick or treating FOREVER!

Happy Late Halloween!

2009-11-14T08:32:00.000-08:00

The Type 1 Mom Song

2009-11-13T08:49:00.001-08:00

This video is so perfect! I have seen it before but saw it on a fellow D-Mom's blog today and thought that I had to post it too! This is totally my life!!

Don't forget that World Diabetes Day is tomorrow!

The Infusion Set

2009-11-12T20:19:00.000-08:00

I need to start this post by making something very clear. When the princess was diagnosed last year and we didn't have any insurance I have never been more scared in my life. To know that I would have a child that would need constant medical attention that could possibly come out of my pocket, and know that it isn't cheap, was enough stress that every time I thought about it I would break down in a sobbing, boogery mess.

Then in January we were finally approved for Medicaid.

I have since been super grateful. All of her medical supplies have been covered at 100%. Even the Dr. visits are covered. Even her pump was covered at 100%!!! You can't get more lucky than that! So with what I am about to complain about please know that I am still grateful!

Ok so here it is. The other day I called the Diabetes Specialty Center where we get all her supplies from. I hadn't received my monthly order yet and I needed to do a site change. When I called them they informed me that they had been audited by Medicaid and they found out they have been giving out the wrong infusion sets. They had a different kind that they were going to send me. I could hear a little hesitation in the girl's voice so I had to ask if there was a big difference in the sets. She said there was a big difference.

Let me show you!

Here are the infusion sets that we have been using. They are the Animas Inset 30's. There is a plastic piece that the connects to tubing so that when she is in the bath or getting dressed it can disconnect really easily. This picture shows the needle in it (just because I still need to use it) but the needle comes out and a small tubing or the cannula stays in her skin. Kind of like an IV. The entire part is sticky so it sticks to her skin really well.

Now here is what we are having to switch to. They are called the Medtronic MiniMed Polyfin with wings. There is nothing to it. There are big differences here. The needle stays under the skin (the entire plastic piece on the end is covering the needle. The plastic piece comes off. It is just the needle that stays in no cannula). Those little wings on the side are not sticky. So that means there is no way for it to stick to the skin. We will have to use this sticky medical tape to have it stick. The other big change is how it connects to the rest of the tubing. The end if this set just connects directly to the end of the tube.

BIG DIFFERENCE!!!

Now here is why I am so scared to use them. She is 5, how in the world is this going to be comfortable for her with that long of a needle under her skin? With nothing being sticky on the set it's self I can see the tubing getting caught on something and it just pulling right out! To top it off they don't have kid size tubing. The tube is almost the entire length as her entire body. This will get in the way a lot! Then another concern is when I disconnect her to take a bath how are we going to stop water from getting in the tube? They are not kid friendly at all! They don't look comfortable, and honestly pretty old school.

I hate complaining about something that I get for free, but isn't my daughter's comfort supposed to be my first concern?

Guys tell me what you think. I am scared to death to use these things.

Call in the Clean Sweep Crew. I dare you!

2009-11-12T07:56:00.000-08:00

I go to bed every night thinking "I am going to get so much done tomorrow!"

Then...

I wake up every morning kicking and screaming that I have to get out of my bed. I find it very hard to find my momentum and motivation these days.

I have always had this desire to be organized but I really NEED it right now. This is really hard for me to explain but I just feel that it is so important for my family to change some things right now in order for us to be truly happy.

Currently I am trying to find the best way to organize my laundry, keeping the house clean, and stick to a daily routine. I have tried different help websites or books but I feel like they are really overwhelming.

Tell me friends, what works for you?

Before you answer that let me tell you what I feel is holding me back.

Laundry- There just isn't a good "staging place" for it. I don't have a laundry room. It is in the bathroom behind folding doors. We have thought a ton about moving it to the basement but think this might take too much living space from the basement. Right now all the dirty clothes, towels, or rugs end up in my bedroom to be sorted and ready to be done. I don't always get it done in one day so it just piles up. I AM TIRED OF IT BEING THERE! I really need help with this!

Keeping the house clean- This is hard for me because I give my kids chores to do, but they are just not old enough to do some things. I start by working on the things they can't do, but by the time I get that done, they have messed up what was just cleaned. It is a never ending vicious cycle. I will say this once (for fear of people thinking that I am mean) we are slobs. It clearly is a problem with people not picking up after themselves. Mostly the kids. How do you stop the cycle in kids with out constantly nagging to get things cleaned up?

A daily routine- I clearly see how this would help with the other two items, but I feel like I just have so much to do that when I try to get on a routine I start to stress about the things that I am not getting to yet. What works for everyone to focus on one thing at a time then to be able to get everything done?

Ok I just realized I sound really lame. You would think that after almost 10 years of being married and almost 7 years of being a parent that I would have this down. For some reason I just don't get it yet. HELP!

The anniversary

2009-11-11T07:58:00.000-08:00

One year ago today I watched my daughter's life change forever.

Who knew the road that we were headed down was going to actually be more of a roller coaster?

One year ago today she found out that she had Type 1 Diabetes.

I think I have shed more tears in this last year than my entire existence combined. But on the flip side I think that we have grown so much in so many ways. We live day to day on faith that no matter what happens we will prevail. We always do. We wake up each morning grateful that we have been given another chance to experience all the ups and downs of life. Together.

Being a parent of a diabetic is not easy. After checking her blood sugar 10 or sometimes more a day every number I see translates to me as a glucose number. It's 53 degrees outside right now and to me that means we need a snack. The time says it is 9:08 but to me that means something has gone seriously wrong and we have to get her blood sugar down. My mind is programed to read everything as it would be diabetes related. Feeling like this is something only someone who takes care of a diabetic would understand.

~blood sugar checks all day and throughout the night.

~Carb counting

~weighing food

~insulin doses at every meal

~Being constantly hooked up to an insulin pump

~changing her site every 3 days with a needle that I am shocked that we are brave enough to use.

~always being aware of changes in her personality, mood, or the way she feels to correct for a low or high

~holding on to any treat or snack that she gets until a meal so she can eat it

~knowing what to do when she is sick to not have her end up in the ER again.

~checking ketones

~using needles to inject insulin when I can't use her pump

~Monthly doctor's appointments

~looking for patterns in her blood sugar to know if any changes need to be made.

~and for mom the first thing I do every morning is walk straight to her room to make sure she is still breathing and that nothing went wrong while I slept.

All of this is our life now.

If someone would have showed me a list like this over a year ago and asked if I think I could handle all that I would died. But guess what? We do it every day.

And I don't even mind because it means that I get to hold my princess and laugh with her and sing with her, and play with her, and learn with her, and cry with her. She is so much more than "that diabetic girl" It is a part of her life but it isn't all of who she is. For this time in our lives I am here to take the diabetes part of her life and make it just as easy for her to live out the rest of her life. I think we make a pretty good team.

Here's to the next 95 years of her having diabetes!

Happy D-anniversary sweetie! Your mommy loves your more than I think you will ever know! I am more proud of you each day, even when I don't think that it is possible. You are a strength to so many. I just pray that as you go through your life that you will know and understand just how important and special you are.

Now off to get my hands on some ice cream. I have thought about it and think that the last time we had ice cream diabetes tried to ruin it for us. We are going to battle it again and not let it win!

Yup! I am still here!

2009-11-10T11:48:00.000-08:00

Ok I have realized lately that I just need to post something! ANYTHING is better here than nothing!

I started my blog YEARS ago and I don't think that I have ever gone this long without an update. So sorry!

So here is another bullet point update just so that I can say that I posted something.

~I had the H1N1 flu last week. I truly thought that I was going to die! I am still trying to get my energy back and kick this cough, but I am grateful to be alive! I might order me a t-shift that says "I survived the swine flu....barely!" LOL!

~I just got back from the dentist. I hate going, but I had a good talk about my new found love of the movie theatre. While in the middle of putting my crown back on the dentist piped up and said "HEY! Wouldn't it be so cool if we all had Transformer teeth?" This made me laugh so hard!

~And incase I haven't mentioned I have a new found love of going to the movies. Not that I have seen that many movies in the last little while, but I have realized that is my favorite date night activity! I have always LOVED watching movies, but there was something about all the awesome blockbuster movies that came out that made me realize HOW MUCH I LOVE GOING!!!! If anyone is thinking of what to get us for Christmas...MOVIE TICKETS!!!

~Diabetes has been pretty crappy lately. In the last 2 months there have been a whole list of things that have made me scream!! First, the princess was rewarded with a milk shake (she had gone above and beyond what I had asked her to do and needed something special) I gave her insulin for half of it and told her to put the rest in the freezer. I got busy and forgot the follow through to see if she really did put it away. NOPE she ate the entire thing. I didn't find out until before bed her meter read and error that she was too high to read. Which means she was somewhere between 600 and a coma. Luckily we got that worked out. But then the next week she got the flu and couldn't stop throwing up. Her blood sugar wouldn't come up much above 80 the entire day. She ended up in the ER dehydrated and a mild case of Keytoacidosis. Then with a few weeks of her numbers being insane we made a ton of changes with her basal and carb ratio and stuff. This helped, but then she got the croup. She had to have a few doses of steroid to help her to breath. The doctor warned me that without changing everything again her blood sugar would run well above 600 for a few days. We had to stop using her pump for the weekend and go back to shots for everything. And yet again had to change EVERYTHING to keep in the 400 range. It was a long weekend! It was even Halloween! She couldn't have any treats or candy until the Monday after Halloween. Boy was I glad that was over! Right now we are back to "normal" but do you know what tomorrow is? Our 1 year anniversary of this crazy disease changing our lives forever! We are going to have to celebrate somehow.

~I started a training class for work. It was supposed to go from 8 at night to 2 in the morning but I got kicked out because of the flu. I have to start it again on Monday, but this time it will be in the morning. I will be grateful when this is over too!

~So I had a birthday too. A few weeks ago I said goodbye to my 20's forever. This has caused me to evaluate my entire life and where I am going. I am so happy with who I chose to marry, and the kids that I have! However I have things that I want to change. I am excited for the future and can't wait to say "my 30th birthday changed my life for the better!"

~One of those things that I am going to change is my weight! I have been touching the side of the scale that I wanted to never see. I am going to do something about it before it is too late. I have agreed to a little friendly competition with some friends and a few strangers to see who can loose the most weight in 8 weeks. Wish me luck! The monetary prize at the end could be SUPER useful!

~I had a little D-mom's chat the other night on MSN live and I LOVED every minute of it! All these mom's I have met through blogging and they have all been such a huge support for me. It was awesome to chat with everyone in one spot. I am so lucky to have these lady's in my life!

~I got a new shift at work that will start in January. I can't wait to start it! I GET TO GO TO CHURCH AGAIN! It will be awesome to not have to worry about that. And I will have all of Saturday off!

~I am really excited for the holidays this year. Trev and I are on the cusp of something fabulous! I don't know what it is yet, but we can FEEL it! This new year is going to be so good to us! I JUST KNOW IT!

~That would be true if we don't loose our insurance first....more on this later, but we are trying to come up with a plan if we loose our insurance and are too poor get purchase a plan somewhere. It will work out though!

Ok guys that is about all that I can think of. That is a good start though! Plan on seeing me more and feel free to yell if I don't keep that promise again!

2009-10-25T20:16:00.000-07:00

I have been a bad blogger lately.

I will be back in full force soon!

Until then enjoy this picture.

I love this kid!

Wanna Win?

2009-10-14T09:52:00.000-07:00

It would be so awesome to go on the Heber Valley Railroad Haunted Canyon! We have never been!

Which is why I SO badly want to win these tickets.

BUT if you win I would be Super happy for you!

Go to Sell...Party of 3's blog and give it a try!

Simple, but True.

2009-10-06T16:11:00.001-07:00

I, like many thousands of people, watched the LDS General Conference this last weekend. I feel so blessed to be able to watch it every 6 months. I tend to really crave it as the time gets closer. This time was no different.

With every talk I felt inspired to do better. Specific ideas were flowing through my head that I felt would make me a better person, wife, and mother. I was filled, literally, to the brim with the spirit to go forth and be more Christlike.

Then Monday morning came.

Monday morning those same inspiring thoughts were still there, but in the same breath I felt so horrible. Every thought I had on how I was going to improve my life was followed by a feeling of inadequacy, being a failure, and being completely overwhelmed. I was so confused as to how I could be feeling feelings at the very opposite sides of the spectrum at the same time. That morning I was sharing this thought with my dear friend NaTasha. She explained that she too feels this way often and has since learned that those inspiring thoughts are not to be overshadowed by the feelings that Satan wants us to feel. He wants us to think that it is too hard, or that we are unworthy to receive inspiration, or that we have already failed. She shared that she feels that there are two simple things that we can focus on and it will help to accomplish all the tasks to reach the goals we have set and to cast away the feelings that are plaguing our soul. By simply praying and faithfully reading our scriptures this will show enough diligence it takes to receive the guidance we need to make everything else fall into place. We will find the inspiration that we need to be better women, we will find patience to deal with the troubles that come up, and most importantly we will find the energy to get to work. With this on my mind, and feeling much better, I went on about my day.

Until we had Family Home Evening.

This was one thing that was on my list of things to do better at. I wanted so badly to sit down and have a wonderful evening with my family, have a lesson that the kids totally got, and to feel like this could really be part of our routine again. By the end of the evening we were all in tears and I was ready to bag it all together. Satan was winning. I knew it and I wanted to be in a better place again. So I put the kids to bed and sat in front of the tv to unwind. I kept thinking of Elder Holland's talk. So many people were talking about it. I was wrestling kids during conference, I knew I had missed something. I turned it on to watch it. I cried. I watched it again. I cried again. (You can listen to a portion of his talk above) To hear is powerful testimony of the Book of Mormon I knew NaTasha was right. This is the guide to make my life better.

Today, I learned the second lesson I needed to truly know for myself that indeed my dearest friend had given me the counsel I needed to hear. I was convinced, with the help of Elder Holland, that reading my scriptures was going to help, but apparently I needed a lesson in prayer too.

I send my little Princess to school everyday with her blood sugar monitor that goes with her pump (she has the Animas Ping. The meter is a remote to her pump. For the record the entire thing cost about $7000!) Today, when I went to get her from school she reported that her meter was lost. The teacher and office staff had been looking for it, but to no avail. I tried my darnedest to not have a panic attack. Instead I prayed. This tester could not be missing! What would I do? What would happen if we never got it back? The insurance wouldn't pay for another, what is really the point in having the "Ping" if it didn't have the remote? I tried to remind myself that if I prayed it will be found. I needed to have faith. The school started to call all the kids in the class to let them know they thought it might have been sent home in the wrong backpack. I prayed some more. It was 45 minutes after the kindergarten classes had gone home. The teacher saw a little girl from Princess' class out in the hallway still with her babysitter. She ran over and told her that they were calling the parents of all the kids to find this tester. The babysitter said that since she wouldn't have gotten the call she was more than welcome to search her backpack. When Mrs. Wilson pulled the tester out of the little girl's backpack I got the chills, so did the teacher. I KNEW that my prayers were answered! This was no doubt in my mind that this was the second half of the lesson that I needed to learn this week. (Also for the record, the tester was put in the wrong backpack by mistake. After her 10:15 testing the school nurse put it in the wrong backpack.)

Such a powerful lesson to learn. I needed to learn that my self esteem should not only be based on all that can be seen. The greater the tasks that one person can do does not tally up to the greatest person of all. What does matter is the importance of each task, the true meaning. I can't be overwhelmed by what I am not doing. Rather I need to be working on the small but simple tasks in order to to have it all fall into place. Now, I have the knowledge of how true, and how incredibly important the small and simple tasks really are in all that is overwhelming.

I am eternally grateful!

Sundays

2009-09-20T13:09:00.000-07:00

I always took going to church every Sunday for granted. When I was a kid we always went as a family, there was never a question. As I got a little older the idea of church to me was so uncool, but seeing my friends there was really the only reason I went. Then I moved out of my house my senior year of high school. This was my freedom, so I thought, to stop going all together. My older sisters were trying to help me see what was important. They were trying to help me stay focused and by doing so they would come to my apartment some Sunday mornings and drag me to church. Honestly the best part of that was staying around for Sunday dinner. I no longer cared to go to church, it lost all importance to me. The reasons really are a topic for another time.

One day I realized I didn't know who I was or where I was going. After a lot of thought and tons of guidance I went back to the very same place that was so familiar to me, but with a brand new importance. The gospel was all the same, the spirit was still the same, and even most of the people was still the same. The only thing that made it so different was my perspective. I KNEW I NEEDED it! And boy did I! It changed my life and was truly exactly what I needed.

Now it is several years later and I am faced with a bit of a dilemma. You see I work for a job that requires me to work every Sunday. I have for a year and a half now and this is really getting to me. Sure I get to go when I am lucky enough to trade my shift or get the time off at the last minute, but most of the time it is uncertain if I get to join my family. The gospel is more important to me now than it ever has been. I feel I need it now more than ever too. To not be able to be there EVERY Sunday is killing me.

When I close my eyes and dream of a perfect Sunday I so clearly see the sight of my family going to church together. Sitting on the bench together and holding hands with my hubby. Even the idea of crayons spread over the bench seems perfect as long as we are all there. Then sitting in Relief Society with my BFF and all the other amazing women in the ward all learning, being uplifted and feeling the spirit. I smell the sent of dinner cooking and yummy treats baking after. Sitting on the couch watching a movie as a family then sending the kids off to bed to spend some alone time with the love of my life. Bliss!

I almost wonder how long it is until I can reach this perfect Sunday. But until then I am so grateful for the times that I am there. Today was almost this perfect. It was the Primary Program today and all week I didn't know if I was going to be able to make it. At the last minute last night someone traded hours with me. This allowed me to be able to go to sacrament to see the program. We sat on the bench behind my BFF and her parents, whom I was super happy to see again. My neighbor that has just started coming back to church again walked across the room to give me our daily hug, there is no perfect place for a daily hug. One of my young women that hasn't been to church in forever and who is really struggling came and sat next to me, I loved it! The kids knew their parts perfectly and sung their hearts out. I couldn't have been more proud. My dear friend in the ward that greets me every Sunday I am there with a hug and a "I am so happy that you were able to get off work to be here with us!" didn't let me down today. But to top off the entire experience my hubby found my wedding ring in his church bag. I thought over a month ago when I realized it was lost that it was gone forever!

You see I may not be able to go to church every Sunday, but the fact that I don't have the option has made me realize just how important it is to me. The times that I do get to go means so much to me. Those days always seem extra special. There will come a time that I won't have to work, but until then I am just grateful for days like today that are as perfect as perfect is going to get!

For now.

Just some silly pictures from our trip to Twin Falls.

2009-09-18T17:30:00.000-07:00

There are more to come!

Enjoy!

The new job

2009-09-16T08:38:00.001-07:00

So most of you know that a year and a half ago my hubby lost his job.

Since then he has worked as a car salesmen, washed windows, tons of odd jobs for people to earn a little extra money, and then the job he is doing now fixing computers and networks as a contract employee.

I consider all those jobs blessings. I really do! Each and every one of them has helped us stay sort of a float. But even with working his tail off it still hasn't been quite enough. He loves working on computers and would love that job to be a full 40 hours a week, but it just isn't. An opportunity came his way to be able to still do that, and work for another job on the side. After lots of prayers and lots of thinking about it he accepted. We are pretty sure this is going to be pretty good for him.

He is now working for World Financial Group as a Financial Advisor. This means he will come into the home of anyone in need of a snapshot of their finances and a plan for their future. He will assist in going over every cent and advise the best plan to be where you want to be with your money. The best part about all this? It is FREE to the client!!! If you are in need of life insurance or any of the other way cool products that will help with financial stability in retirement then he can get you set up with those (they are not free, but something that everyone needs!)

So that is it! If anyone knows anyone that could benefit from any of this let us know! He needs the practice with friends and family, so don't be annoyed if he calls you to set up a meeting! He works on leads (given from the company and from friends and family) so he is still trying to build up a clientele.

I am excited to see him doing what he has been wanting to do. It is exactly what he was doing at the bank, but has the freedom to do more. It is good to see him have more confidence in himself again. With the hard path that we have traveled he deserves to be successful!

Him

2009-09-15T11:47:00.000-07:00

I love this guy! He is the best!

Even when he motivates me to start working out again.....when I don't really want to!

He makes THE BEST peach pie!

His garden is so amazing that the green beans are longer than his entire hand.

When I get lazy on the house work he does it all so I can get caught up again.

He gets up in the middle of the night to do the blood sugar tests when I don't really want to.

He kisses me good bye every time he leaves.

He will bring me Peanut Butter M&M's and Dr. Pepper when I am grumpy.

He takes the kids to church when I have to work.

The list goes on and on, but the best of all is that he loves his family and works hard for us!

He does so much for our little family, and has really been through a lot in the last year and a half. I really wanted to let him know that I appreciate him and that I love him to death!

Good luck with your new job honey! I love you!

2009-09-10T14:45:00.000-07:00

I got this email this morning:

"Your blog called me. It asked me to give you a poke and say "where is the love?""

I love you Holly!

You are right. My blog does need a little love.

So just because of that I am going to list a few things that over the next little bit I will be blogging about. Just so you can consider yourself updated.

~Back to school. Can you believe I haven't done that yet?

~My awesome pump holders that family and friends have made!

~The coolest package I got in the mail from the coolest sister in law!

~The JDRF walk! It was amazing guys! What a cool thing!

~Our trip to Twin Falls, Idaho. I know what you are thinking....the ONLY chance we get to take a family trip and we go to IDAHO? Don't laugh! It was awesome!

~What my hubby is up to! I love that guy!

and

~Whoever thought I could go a month without writing about diabetes was wrong. I have an update.

Now, there you have it. Somewhat of an update. I promise I will post pictures too.

Missed you guys! But I will not let you down!

First Things First

2009-08-20T12:51:00.000-07:00

I will get to blogging about my life later...as for now check out my cute new niece. I got to take her pictures this morning. I am one lucky aunt to have such cute nieces and nephews.

This cutie is 2 weeks old. She was SUPER tiny when she was born and hasn't grown much since. Holding her and loving her was just what I needed today!

You can check out a few of my favorites here.

GUESS WHAT?

2009-08-19T13:23:00.001-07:00

My super awesome friend Holly is having a little fun with raising money for our JDRF team!

Go check out her blog and see what it's all about!

You can get a FREE bar of the AMAZING Spotted Owl Soap just with a donation of $10 or more! This stuff is so good it's even my Hubby's favorite soap! And when was the last time your hubby cared what kind of soap he uses? YEA, IT IS THAT GOOD!

Thanks Holly!

This Girls Has a Story!

2009-08-04T08:37:00.000-07:00

Some of you may be new to my blog and some of you have been around for awhile. I have been asked a few times about the Princess' story of when she was diagnosed recently so I thought it would be a perfect time to post some links to where you can read about it. I have written about it many times since November so feel free to search my archives (maybe someday I will put labels on my posts) or email me with any questions you might have!

We had been noticing symptoms that something wasn't right for a few weeks. They were progressively getting worse too. I wrote this post when all I could do was think about it. The thought of what was wrong was keeping me up at night! I knew something was wrong but with not having insurance I didn't want to over react. I was inspired to take her to the doctor and after meeting with her doctor, I made this quick post before heading to the hospital where we spent the week.

I tried to post my thoughts each day to keep record of that time. My mind was still in shock a little, and I was so tired. Reading over this, this and this post I am not sure how I even managed a full sentence! It was so hard for me to see my 4 year old little girl getting poked SO many times. Our new life seemed overwhelming, but around every corner I could see how our lives where being blessed! To this day my heart is so full love and gratitude for all that helped, for all the prayers that were said on our behalf. See this post that I wrote about some of the ways we had been helped! It made it possible to look at the strength that she had and because of her we could handle it all! What a brave girl!

It isn't always easy though! There have been many times that are tough and it seems to be more than I can handle. But through it all my Princess can still smile, she can still be brave. She is an amazing example to all those around her.

And in case you have forgotten, we are still looking for people to join our team and to help raise money for the JDRF Walk for a Cur . See this post below on how you can help!

2009-08-03T12:27:00.000-07:00

Our family is organizing a team for the JDRF Walk for a Cure on August 29th. This is our first year doing this and I couldn't be more excited! I have been busy trying to recruit people to our team and raising money to reach our goal of $1000.

If anyone living in the Salt Lake City area (or want to travel I suppose) and want to be part of our team please go HERE and sign up. We would LOVE to have you join us! Your efforts with raising money will help out a ton too!

If you want to just donate to our team you may go HERE. Even a dollar will be super helpful! And thanks in advance, you will never know how much this means to us!

This is going to be so much fun! I have participated in walks before like the Relay for Life. We did that as a family for a few years in a row. I even have organized a walk a thon for elementary school kids that was with the Muzak Heart and Soul foundation. They were all really cool, but this one hits home a little more than the others. To think that with our efforts there could be a cure for diabetes! What an awesome thing! I think about how diabetes has changed our lives, then I think of how much a CURE COULD CHANGE OUR LIVES and I get emotional! (I know what you are thinking, I am just an emotional person lately anyway!LOL!)

To someday say that she USED to have type 1 diabetes would be a fabulous thing people! SIMPLY FABULOUS!

Family is what is most important!

2009-08-02T15:42:00.001-07:00

2009-07-29T20:21:00.000-07:00

I was wanting to post a few things tonight after I put the kids to bed. I wanted to write all about Dude's first day of 1st grade, and about the awesome friend I have the came to my rescue with a pump holder. I even have a post almost ready to show off how totally awesome (and creative) my sister in law is. But for some reason I can't get diabetes off my mind.

Actually it is always there at the forefront of my mind. It never leaves. But tomorrow we are meeting with her Kindergarten teacher and the school nurse to talk about things before she starts school next week. We also have our first appointment with the Endocrinologist since getting the pump. I am nervous.

I started to get all emotional about diabetes again tonight. This happens occasionally, but even more so when things are not going how I would like them to. Some of our problems have been my fault and that makes it worse. Like the other night when in a sleep stupor I checked her and saw that she was at like 218. I gave her insulin then realized that I am not supposed to correct her at night until she is over 250! I laid in bed the rest of the night checking her every our or so to see if she was ok. Dummy me! But that isn't all! My sisters were going to watch her while I had to work on Monday. I was trying to show them how to work her pump. She was standing right by me then I told her to go play. She ran downstairs and I continued to show them how to use it. Well, it delivered the insulin! OH CRAP! I ran down and checked her she was at 77 with 3/4 of insulin on board already from lunch....yes already crashing. To top it off I accidentally gave her 1.80 units of insulin! I had to leave so I could make it to work on time, but as I was leaving my sisters gave her some chocolate milk and cookies...I cried the rest of the way home. It all ended fine, but it is so hard to forgive myself when I do things like this. I am supposed to be taking care of her, not making it worse!

So I went back and read my posts from when she was diagnosed in November and I cried. I cried at all the comments, I cried because my emotions were so raw then and I could feel them all over again. I cried because I can't help but feel why her sometimes. I cried because I don't know that I was cut out for this job, but yet I was so humbled when she was first diagnosed. Have I lost that?

Yes, I am a little stressed. Starting school is going to kill me. I realize it is just half a day, but that is half the day that she will be away from home under the care of someone else. Sitting in a class with 25 other kids with one teacher. Sitting in a school with one school nurse that is also the nurse for 11 other schools. No one knows my princess like her mommy and daddy. We can be across the room and know if she is high or low. I fear that something will be wrong and that no one will know until something terrible happens.

I suppose you would say right now I have two choices....stop stressing about things I have no control over (my dad's famous advice) or to have another restless night while making my self sick from stress.

Can I pick right in the middle?

Are you missing me?

2009-07-27T22:21:00.000-07:00

I have so much to post but I just can't find the time to do it.

I need to make it priority though because I miss you guys!

When I am not making really stupid diabetes choices (wait until you hear what I did today! DIABETIC MOTHER OF THE YEAR RIGHT HERE! I will get to it soon! I promise!) or going on spontaneous camping trips, or getting the kids ready to start school, or trying to get my house in order I will sit down to post.

See you soon!

I heart my blogging friends.

2009-07-13T15:47:00.000-07:00

Ok that last post is just lame.

Sorry! Maybe this will make up for it!

I have been thinking lately that there are some really cool people out there in the wonderful world of blogging! I have truly been touched this week in more ways than one by bloggers. Can I share with you why?

Chelsea, a long lost friend and fellow blogger came to my rescue with a REALLY cool belt that she made for the Princess' pump. (I am planning a post dedicated entirely to this so stay tuned) She read I was in need and came to my rescue! I was really touched! And it is awesome! If she had the time I would say to mass produce these things! SO CUTE!

I was blog stalking the other night and came across Shamae's blog. I cried when I watched the video about her daughter having diabetes. I sent her a comment and soon after that I felt like she was a long time friend. She sent me an email about a JDRF lunch the next day and wouldn't you know it SHE WAS GOING TO BE THERE! I had the privilege in meeting her and talking with her for a bit! I felt inspired by her and can't wait to read her blog more and maybe see her at more JDRF functions! Shamae, thanks again! I am so pumped about the Walk for a Cure!

I met Tristan a few months ago through a mutual blogging friend of ours. She emailed me after realizing the my daughter is diabetic. She too is diabetic and over the last few months has sent me the sweetest emails of encouragement and help! This last week she has received a CGM and is feeling the weight of diabetes. (I don't really know that for sure, but after reading her blog I am just assuming that!) I have been touched by her strength, and by her honest caring for people like me that she doesn't even know. Go give her some blogging love! I think she could use it!

Another old friend of mine, Aubrey, is feeling the stress of being pregnant. Her last post about weight gain and pregnancy touched me. She poured out her heart and I SO KNOW HOW SHE FEELS! Aubrey, hang in there!

Also there is Jill from Diabetes Sweeties. Her daughter is celebrating her 1 year D-Anniversary and Jill is celebrating her 1 year Blog-Anniversary. I have been reading Jill's posts for awhile now and every time I do I feel empowered to not let this disease get me down. She doesn't sugar coat it (no pun intended!) but yet she makes it all apart of her life. With her anniversaries coming up I wanted to send her a shout out...THANK YOU JILL! You have helped me, and taught me more than you will ever know!

Then there is AJSMOMMY she is new to this blogging community. Her daugher was just diagnosed with diabetes. I read her last post and all the feelings of when Princess was diagnosed all come flooding back to me. I cired. Why do we get so emotional over this time in our life? Reading her post brought me back to that moment. I can't help but feel for her. I pray that she can find strength!

I have met so many other cool people that have touched my life while I have been blogging. My hubby even mentioned to me the other day that blogging has really been good for me. Through every trial in the last 3 plus years that I have been doing this, I have been helped by so many! I am grateful for this community that some may laugh at, people that I call friends, but have never met! Thank you for sharing your stories so that other may learn. Thank you for your support and help to bring me up when I feel so down!

Yes, I am bored.

2009-07-13T11:59:00.000-07:00

For lack of excitement going on in my "real life" I am now going to post something really lame that has been on my mind lately.

My list of things that I think should grow on trees.

Yes you read that right. I have actually thought about this more times than I would like to admit lately. I will be in the middle of something and actually think "Man, I wish [that] grew on trees!" So here you have it. My list. Feel free to add any you have thought of.

money - of course who doesn't think this.

peanut butter M&M's - I NEED an ample supply of these!

dish towels - it seems that I am always in need of this. Mine are always dirty, stained, gross, etc. If I could just reach out the back door, grab a towel this would save oodles of time and energy.

sprinkler parts - how many times in one month do YOU need to run to Home Depot for parts?

balloons- the ultimate entertainment for kids.

diapers - clean and unused of course! They cost too much money and I always seem to need one when it is an EMERGENCY!

scissors- it doesn't matter HOW MANY times I put them back in the drawer they still magically disappear.

patience- If this could be bottled and available at my finger tips there would be less complaining on my part. I would most likely be drunk with daily. That is the hope anyway.

hand sanitizer - there is a community of people out there and are just like my husband, germophoebes. There would be trees placed at every entrance to any public building to put people like my hubby's minds at ease.

15 carb snacks- a 15 carb snack tree would grow any type of snack ranging from juice boxes to cookies, granola bars, anything that is exactly 15 carbs. Any diabetic or parent of a diabetic could appreciate this! That way when some one's blood sugar is low there would choice, accessibility, and less chance of a crash. Plus I am in desperate need of 15 carb snack for my storage and the school's storage. I wouldn't have to worry about paying for them if I had my own tree in the back yard.

clean clothes- disposable clothes.....maybe not the best idea, but I sure would have a lot more free time if I could eliminate laundry from my to do list.

answers- this is a little strange, but sort of like the 8 ball or a fortune cookie that gives you advice, think of a tree. This would be a little more accurate. The tree would grow answers based on the needs it over hears. I would love to ponder something out loud in the shade of a tree and be able to pick the exact answer you needed!

lunch- for some reason I am not a fan of making lunch. I never know what to make, and I get tired of sandwiches every day. A lunch tree would be full of every type of lunch food already prepared and complete with carb count.

So there you have it. My list. Enjoy!

We are in LOVE!

2009-07-08T07:44:00.000-07:00

With the Animas Ping that is!

Everything has been going GREAT with it! Not a single tear when we change her site NOTHING! (I might have just cursed myself) She has been proving how brave she is once again!

Her numbers have been so good too. There have been a few highs but I know exactly what they are from. An air bubble one time and then there were the times I let her disconnect for a bath and running through the sprinklers. It was nothing that couldn't be controlled.

I am desperate to find some type of holder for it though. We tried to just clip it to her pants or to a belt and it comes off or pulls down her pants. She had has it 3 days and had already scratched it up. Bummer! It isn't her fault though, it is just a little heavy to clip to her pants. We ended up putting the black leather case on it to protect it, but that just makes it more heavy and pretty bulky. It will work for now. I have some ideas for holders and such but until money grows on trees I will have to make do with what I have.

Overall it has been such a blessing to have the pump. I can't believe that it all worked out the way that it did. It is exactly what she (we) needed! She loves to show it off to people and tell them how it works. I can only imagine how she feels. Without the roller coaster of the highs and lows I bet she feels much better!

2009-07-07T10:09:00.000-07:00

I just got caught up on a bunch of posts I have been meaning to write. I will come back tomorrow to write and update on how the pump is going!

Thanks for being patient with me being a slacker!

The Citizenship Award

2009-07-06T16:50:00.000-07:00

We got a call the other day from the school saying that Little Dude was going to get a special award called the Citizenship award in the assembly the next day. We were invited to attend to watch him receive it.

The Citizenship award is the student of the year award for his class. Each teacher picked one student to receive it. Dude got it for his class! We are so proud of him! His teacher has so many nice things to say about him. She said that we should be really proud since he is a great student and friend to others in his class. He has been taking his trophy around showing it off to grandparents and family! It is so nice to see him proud of his success!

He also received a metal for the Distinguished Bear Cub award. They receive this when they reach all the goals set for their grade. What a successful Kindergarten year!

Here he is getting his Bear Cub award from his teacher.

Here he is getting his Citizenship award from the principal. The smile on his face cracks me up. He gets goofy when he is embarrassed. Just like his mom!

What a good kid!

The Signs of Summer

2009-07-06T16:49:00.000-07:00

BBQ With Friends

2009-07-06T16:46:00.000-07:00

We were invited over to a friends house for a BBQ the other day. We had some great food, awesome company, the kids played great together, and best of all an entire table full of stuff for S'mores. The recipe for the perfect night!

Little Man got his clothes all wet and went around most of the night with just a diaper on. It didn't slow him down! Here he is playing in the sandbox with his "Buddy".

This is NaTasha and Matt. They were the hosts of the BBQ and honestly two of the coolest people I know!

Oh he is going to kill me for posting this picture! This is usually what I get when I tell him to smile. Such a smart alec!

The S'more table! This isn't even all of it either. We tried something new this night! It was DELICIOUS! Graham crackers with sliced strawberries, chocolate bar, and toasted marshmallow! YUMMY!

We always love sitting around a bon fire with good friends and good food! It doesn't take much for us to be entertained!

Rainy Summer

2009-07-06T16:44:00.000-07:00

This has been one of the rainiest summers in the history of man kind. Ok maybe just as long as I can remember. The other day we had to most beautiful rainbow (as seen on every other Utahn's blog) Here is my picture of it and of the kids playing in the puddles.

This is "Buddy". These two boys are the best of friends. His mom and I went on walks every day for months before they were born. They were born 11 days apart. It is silly how well they play together too!

Family Adventure- Deer Valley Picnic

2009-07-06T15:59:00.000-07:00

We have still been doing our family adventures, but I have been a slacker on my blog lately and haven't posted about them. I did have some great pictures of our little trip up to Deer Valley Ski Resort in Park City the other day. Daddy was going to be working up in Park City for a little bit so we decided to take a lunch and tag along.

We sat on the grass at the bottom of a ski lift, ate our lunch and played. It was beautiful! There wasn't any better place to sit and eat PB&J's and apples.

The kids had a great time playing around. The walked all over the place!

That was until Little Man's shoe fell off. Dude carried him to the grass so we could put it back on. This was a pretty tender moment. It just goes to show how much he loves his little brother!

I am so grateful for our family adventures! It has really helped us to enjoy our time together and to get out of the house. I really hope that we are making memories for our children that they will remember as the best times of their life. I know they are for me!

Toothless

2009-07-06T15:38:00.000-07:00

We had a bunch of family here for a BBQ and for a bon fire a few weeks ago (June 19th to be exact) and the craziest thing happened. My niece pulled out her loose tooth. She just took a napkin and pulled it right out. That was it.

Well Dude had a loose tooth too, but it was his very first loose tooth and was super scared to pull it out. I had my niece show him what he did and that started the excitement. He was talking to my brother in law and he told him to tie it to a door nob and just slam the door closed. He wasn't too happy about the idea so he got scared again. My sister in law said that if it hurt him to pull it out she will give him $2. Money will motivate this kid to do almost anything so he agreed. She reached right in and pulled it out! That was it! It didn't even hurt him! He was really excited!

The bad part about all this is his cousin was talking about how she gets $5 a tooth from the tooth fairy. I kept telling him that he shouldn't count on that! Well when the tooth fairy came it looks like that is all that she had. Who knows maybe she didn't want to run to get change at 2:00 in the morning!

So here are a few pictures of the toothless dude. They were taken at 1:30 in the morning so he was being a little silly.

You know what else is really cool? His other cousin lost a tooth the next day while we were still hangin' out! Must have been the weekend for it!

A lesson in Forgiveness

2009-07-01T19:04:00.000-07:00

This story goes back a few months ago when I went to pick Little Dude up from school. I was talking to his teacher when I felt a tug on my jacket. I looked down to this cute little girl giving my a funny look. Without hesitation she said to me "Um, just so you know, your boy has a crush on me!" Then she runs off. I have never seen dude's face a brighter shade of red! I kind of teased him about it (come on you would have too!) and asked him if it was true. The response I got of "NO!!" was more comical than anything else.

So fast forward a few months. Dude came home from school absolutely mortified. Right away he said that he was hanging on the monkey bars during recess and this same little girl came up to him and pulled his pants down! She got in BIG trouble and was sent to the principals office. He was pretty miffed! I was a little too! I have never seen him more embarrassed in my life! He came home for the next few days and talk about how she sat on the playground and cried at recess because her punishment was not being able to play. This made dude feel really bad! He hated seeing her cry.

We were talking about it one day and I told him to maybe talk to her about it. He wasn't sure what to say to her. I asked if he was still mad at her for pulling his pants down. He said he wasn't so I told him to maybe tell her that it was ok and that they could still be friends.

I hadn't heard anything more about it so I assumed that everything was ok. From the fact that he got her phone number at school today and was dieing to call her when he got home just goes to show that he forgives her, and that they in fact are still friends!

The lesson to learn here is to not hold a grudge against the one that pants you on the playground at school! Everyone can be forgiven!

Tomorrow is a big day!

2009-07-01T14:10:00.000-07:00

There are so many things happening here at our house! I have about a gazillion pictures to share and about as many more stories.

Despite all the craziness I can't stop being nervous for tomorrow. We have our very first pump training class tomorrow morning. This has all happened a little quick. Once Medicaid gave us the approval on the pump it was here a few days later. The doctor's office doesn't really want to put her on a saline trial since she will be starting school in exactly one month. They want to have as much time on the pump before I send her off to her first day of Kindergarten (whaa!)

Don't get me wrong, I am so excited for her. But have any of you seen her? She isn't very big! I still don't know how she is going to have this attached to her all the time. How we are going to stick her with this needle (that was a little longer than I though) in any fat? She doesn't really have any! And where am I going to store the pump? I just know that if I put it in a pocket (like there would be room in there anyway, her pockets are so small) or attach it to the top of her pants her little pants (that are always saggy anyway) will fall right to her ankles. I am sure this will all get worked out over time, but all day today this is what I keep thinking about.

So in other big news our little dude's last day of kindergarten is tomorrow! FINALLY! He will have a super short summer, since he starts up again in 3 weeks! Anyway, we got a call from the school yesterday saying he was going to receive an award and it will be given to him in the assembly tomorrow (which was today. got that?) Well he was awarded the Citizenship award. Apparently this is like the student of the year award! Yea that's right STUDENT OF THE YEAR!!! There is one child awarded from each class and Dude was it for his class! I am so proud of him! His teacher had so many nice things to say about him! What a great kid I have! You should have seen him smiling ear to ear when they gave him the trophy! He also got the Distinguished Bear Cub award for reaching all the kindergarten goals this year! YAY DUDE! I just have to say that all that this family has been through this past year, I am just so glad that he has still been able to concentrate! We really are so proud of him!

So I really do need to get caught up with all these pictures I have been taking! Some will really make you laugh! I have a few stories that will make you cry too, but I will get to those last! Wish us luck tomorrow! It is going to be a big day for everyone!

Guess what she got?

2009-06-26T09:56:00.000-07:00

I can't even tell you how blessed we feel to have the Animus Ping! We are just happy to have a pump in general, but we have heard great things about the Ping. I still can't believe it!

We were sitting on the couch a few minutes ago and she leaned over to me and whispered "I got a pump!" She is so excited! She was getting a little nervous about it the other day though. I don't think she really knows what to expect, none of us really do, but I think she understands how this is really going to help her.

A year ago I would have never guessed that we would be dealing with diabetes. Now almost everything we do revolves around it! I am overcome by emotion when I think about how our lives have changed. It is no longer sadness though. She is so lucky that she has one of THE BEST Endocrinologists in the Western States as her doctor. I am still surprised with the reputation that Dr. Swinyard has. There are so many people that know him. Even when we went to the Diabetes Expo everyone knew who he was. She is so lucky to live in a time where it can be controlled the way that it is. To have a pump available to her that will make things so much easier. To have the possibility (we hope) to find a cure for diabetes in her lifetime. Or at least have the research done to always be finding ways to improve her lifestyle. The thing that I am most emotional about is the way she deals with it. She has such a grownup understanding of all this. It blows my mind that she has such control and can really listen to her body. I am so proud of her. When I say she is amazing I really mean it!

This pump is going to change our lives. I can't wait! We now just need to go to the training class and learn how to use this crazy thing. And I need to learn to get over my fear of hurting her. Those needles are a little longer than I expected! Wish us luck!

Roasted Starburst Treats

2009-06-25T11:14:00.000-07:00

This is a treat that I don't take credit for. It was shown to us by my cousin a few years ago. There has been some fine tuning over the years to make it even better. It sounds strange but I tell you it is pretty dang tasty!

So back to our ingredients again. All you are going to need is the Nilla Wafers and Starburst candy. That is it.

Step 1- Unwrap and two flavors of Starburst candies. My hubby happens to like the yellow and orange ones. You are going to stick them on the end of the roasting sticks like so... We like the smaller sticks because they stick on there really easy.

Step 2- Roast the Starburst just until they get bubbly. They cook fast so pay attention. We have lost more Starbursts in the fire than I would like to admit.

Step 3- Put the roasted Starbursts in the Nilla Wafers to make a sandwich.

Now you could stop there and enjoy the crunchy cookie with the soft candy inside. This alone is really good, but if you want a softer cookie go on to the next step.

Step 4- Take the entire cookie and balance it on the stick, or stick it back on the end of the stick to put it back into the fire. Roast it for just a few seconds on each side. This makes the cookie really soft. Be careful not to burn it though. That isn't so good.

Now I know that everyone is going to have a bag of Starburst at their next camp out! This usually ends up being a favorite for everyone!

Peanut Butter S'mores

2009-06-25T10:36:00.000-07:00

Words do not describe how wonderful these little treats are! I think the idea stemmed from my obsession with everything peanut butter and how to add it to a s'more. We have been able to get the technique down perfect for the perfect amount of melt, and gooeyness (is that even a word?) for it to be HEAVENLY!

HEAVENLY I TELL YOU!

Wanna know how to make them? Good so I will tell you! Here is what you will need. Some the ingredients will be used for another treat so just hold off on that.

All you are really going to need is marshmallows, graham crackers, and a peanut butter cup. You will want to get everything you need on a plate before you start roasting it. I promise this makes a difference with the final result! It isn't as good if you have to unwrap the peanut butter cup after you roast the marshmallow.

Step 1 - Put your marshmallow on the roasting stick. We suggest you use a small stick with the prongs close together. There is a reason for this that you will see in a later step.

Step 2- Roast your marshmallow. I happen to like them a little toasty. This picture shows it on fire. That was more of an oops than anything else, but oh well. It was still good!

Step 3- After your marshmallow is toasted. Take it off the stick and place it on top of the peanut butter cup. Now this is where the smaller roasting stick comes in handy! In order to get the peanut butter melted enough to be a little gooey you will want to stick that in the fire too. So take the marshmallow and the peanut butter cup an balance it on top of the roasting stick. You will put it back in the fire for just a second! Too long and it will melt off the stick. And that would be a disaster!

Step 4- While using part of the graham cracker scrape it all of the stick and onto the graham cracker. See why you need a plate?

Then you have it! The soul reason I can't loose as much weight as I would like. Everyone needs to try this at least once! THEY ARE THAT GOOD! I guess the only exception is if you like peanut butter, but stay tuned. I have a few more things we roast that might tickle your non-peanut butter fancy!

Weekly Bon Fire

2009-06-25T09:17:00.001-07:00

It seems that every week this summer we have been having a bon fire in my back yard. It usually starts by our friends and us wanting to do something, but then realize we are all too poor to go do anything. It has turned out to be a blast every time! Different friends will come by and sometimes the same old people here. Last week we had family in town from New York that we invited over. I would even go as far to say this is turning out to be a tradition.

The kids usually jump on the trampoline or play on the swing set while the adults sit and chat around the fire. It is super relaxing! We have been coming up with some new things to roast over the fire too. I will make a separate post for that so stay tuned! Here are some pictures of our bon fire a few weeks ago (that got rained out). They aren't the greatest pictures, it was getting pretty dark.

Transformers Revenge of the Fallen

2009-06-24T09:10:00.000-07:00

There is this little "tradition" of sorts in our neighborhood (well mostly with the next door neighbors, but my hubby usually just tags along). Whenever a really good movie comes out they go see the midnight showing of it on the day it comes out. Well I wasn't going to miss out on the Transformers movie! It is one of my favorites! So along with my half my neighbors (and half the high school population) my hubby and I went to the 12:03 showing of Transformers Revenge of the Fallen.

It was really good! I loved it! There are a few parts that they added some language and such that didn't need to be there, but over all I thought it was really good. There was a lot more transforming in this movie and honestly that is the best part! The sound effects were amazing and the twins (aka the ice cream truck), I thought, were great! The worst part was when they were right in the middle of this big fight scene and the movie stopped and the lights came on. It took them almost 20 minutes to get it fixed. I hate it when that happens!

Over all I am happy that we went. Even if I didn't realize the movie was almost 3 hours long so we got home at almost 4. Then we came home to two sick kids with high fevers. Lucky for me Dude wasn't going to go to school with a fever like that so we got to sleep in a bit. Thanks to my sister in law spending the night so we could go have a fun date night.

Family Adventure - Bowling at Fat Cats

2009-06-15T08:33:00.000-07:00

It has been awhile since I have posted about our family adventures. We have been going on them every week still, so I will have to do a catch up post on the things that we have been doing.

This last week our adventure was going bowling at Fat Cats. This was a cool adventure because it was sponsored by the JDRF (Junior Diabetics Research Foundation). We had a blast! The kids loved it! We were babysitting my friends kids so they had to come with us and I am pretty sure they loved it too!

(please forgive me for the terrible quality of these pictures. I had my camera set to automatic so Little Dude could take pictures too and they all ended up pretty dark)

Some of the highlights of the night are:

~ loosing the little boy that we were watching. We had been there for 5 minutes and trying to find a lane and he wandered off. Thankfully he knew to go to the front desk and tell them he was lost.

~My hubby stealing my camera and ending up with a series of pictures of my behind. Be grateful then didn't end up here.

~My hubby getting a strike and then me getting a strike right after him. Our scores never got to over 90 so don't be impressed!

~The fact that my 2 year old Little Man won the game!

~That all the pizza and bowling was free!

~Learning about how we are going to raise money for the JDRF Walk for a Cure. We are STOKED to start this! Team Superhero here we come!

It was a great night!

The New Blog

2009-06-11T08:48:00.000-07:00

With a private blog you can only invite 100 people. I have more readers than that. Plus it was getting to be a pain to enter all those email address in. So this is my solution, a new blog all together.

It is really bittersweet. I have been Mommy Going Crazy for years now. I was the FIRST Mommy Going Crazy blogger out there! (trust me I have checked). I don't even know that this is going to solve the problem anyway. Whoever my hater is could end up here too. But trust me I have taken precautions to be a little more safe here on my blog. (by the way my comment hater isn't the only reason for this change. I will go into this in another post)

This is still pretty time consuming, but I like this solution better. It will take me some time to get things all set up so be patient with me. My first issue is that when I imported my blog to here it did it twice. I now have every post I have ever written on here twice. I am trying to delete them, but that is taking FOREVER! The other thing is I lost ALL of my comments. BUMMER! Oh well! Life will go on!

I do have a few questions though, all those that put pictures on your blog I want to know two things. How do you make it so no one can open them (or copy them) and how do I make them bigger? My last question is that I really want a 3 column blog. Where are some cute templates for that?

So there you have it. Thanks for your patients! You guys are AWESOME!

Pump

2009-06-08T16:12:00.000-07:00

So I wasn't planning on posting anything until my blog when private, but I am so excited about this that I couldn't resist!

I just got a phone call from the Animus Ping rep. We found out that the Princess' pump will be covered at 100%!!!! A pink one just might be on it's way in just a few days!

I CRIED!!!!! I am SUPER excited!

2009-06-05T07:14:00.000-07:00

Hi again everyone!

Sorry about all this Junior High drama. It was something I didn't ask for but was thrown upon me. With a public blog I suppose that is putting my family in a vulnerable position. So yes, my blog is here again. But not for long. I will be making the change to private in one week from today. I will need email address of anyone that wants to view it (haters need not apply). Even if you are family I need to have an email address since many of you have more than 1 and I wouldn't know which one to use. You can leave a comment or send it to my email pittakgr at hotmail dot com. Thanks for being patient guys, I hate private blogs just like the next guy.

2009-06-03T09:41:00.001-07:00

Dear Anonymous,

If you feel you need to cause problems, pack up your baggage and move somewhere else. If you feel you have something legit to say why are you hiding?

~Mommy Going Crazy